Feel like a complete failure

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2008
Feel like a complete failure
26
Wed, 10-20-2010 - 1:14pm

Hi all,

It has taken me days to get the courage up to write this.

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Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
Thu, 10-21-2010 - 12:04pm
Hi LL, I have been reading all the responses you got...wow!! You have got support, girl! It really sucks (the healing process) some days, and especially in the beginning. I am a newbie here too, and I want to give you a warm welcome! I was posing on MAS back in the foggy days and was somewhat afraid to post here because I wasn't ready for the reality and the "whipping into shape" that I so desperately needed to get on the path of healing and coming to grips with MY issues. I posted my story on here yesterday, if you want to find out where I am coming from. I had my first real emotional blow-out after seeing xAP at work, and though it hurt like he**, I made it out of that with a bit more strength to face the next time. It is great to see you making the necessary steps to getting better, LL! Hearts<3
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Thu, 10-21-2010 - 12:05pm

"Many of life's failures are men who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up."

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2008
Thu, 10-21-2010 - 12:06pm
NoMore--

Wow! Thank you! Your post REALLY resonated with me. The vicious cycle has been a part of my life for all these years. Dammit, I DID go NC for 45 days and started feeling better. Much better. Then I caved thinking magically that he'd come to his senses! OMG.

Yes, my MM, with his sex abuse background, is so stilted from those events and it terrifies him to even TALK about possibly divorcing his wife and leaving his teenagers in turmoil. I really think in my case my M was also a sex addict--and do I want to take that on? NO! He will never leave his family due to FEAR. I could go on and on about that but it doesn"t solve MY issues.

I and going to cut this man out and go NC and will make it my GOAL if it takes until I'm 100. No more hell. I am DONE playing therapist to a weak man.

THANK YOU for the empowerment today!!!!!!!!!!

P.s. as I sit here typing this I am staring at my cell phone--it's tempting me and I will NOT text him anymore. DONE.
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 10-21-2010 - 7:33pm

A suggestion:

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-16-2010
Fri, 10-22-2010 - 12:19am

Hello and welcome back!

You are in the right place, that is for sure!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2010
Fri, 10-22-2010 - 12:27am

Melinda,

GREAAAAAAAAAAAT point!!!!

Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010

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