Feeling Down Today - MM's Birthday
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Feeling Down Today - MM's Birthday
| Fri, 06-04-2004 - 1:00pm |
Hi everyone, I have not posted in awhile. I have been trying to forget about MM. Its been just over 2 mos. since I last saw him. Then we did not talk at all for about the last 4 weeks then all of a sudden I heard from him 2 weeks ago today. And we talked on the phone a week ago last Monday.
Well today is his birthday. And last year I did see him on this day and gave him a special gift (very naughty of me).
So although I tried to resist, I did end up sending him an email just saying "happy birthday, remember your last one?"
I do miss him, but apparently he's really trying to maintain the NC. Its probably for the best I know, because I have been doing better with H lately too.
But still, it is bittersweet and sad to me, thinking about him.
Take care everyone,
Dusty
Well today is his birthday. And last year I did see him on this day and gave him a special gift (very naughty of me).
So although I tried to resist, I did end up sending him an email just saying "happy birthday, remember your last one?"
I do miss him, but apparently he's really trying to maintain the NC. Its probably for the best I know, because I have been doing better with H lately too.
But still, it is bittersweet and sad to me, thinking about him.
Take care everyone,
Dusty

And unfortunately as for H, he is working all night and tomorrow night too, I'll barely see him.
I don't know about MM, he was trying not to contact me because his W was suspicious of him. I'm pretty sure if it wasn't for her saying things to him, we'd still be seeing each other like we were, a few times a month. And then last week on the phone he was really into the idea of us getting together again, that day he called me he wanted me to come and meet him right then!! But I got myself out of that, because I didn't want to feel used by just running when he asks. So then he said we should get together the next day, but then he didn't contact me after that phone call.
So I don't know. But I'm trying to get myself over it. Its kind of hard to think that I will NEVER see him again. So I try not to think that, but just to think I may not see him for AWHILE.
This way, I guess I am deceiving myself into not thinking it is the end.
Dusty