FREAKING OUT-HELP!

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2010
FREAKING OUT-HELP!
26
Wed, 07-14-2010 - 2:08pm

Sorry to sound so alarmist, but i am really freaking out right now.
My PCP called to tell me that i have had an abnormal pap test and need to see an obgyn for additional testing. my first thought: my AP gave me HPV, which will turn into warts, which means i'll have to tell my H, which means he'll divorce me, which means i'll be alone and miserable.

i'm trying to fight that downward spiral by reminding myself that many women have abnormal paps that turn out to be nothing, the chances of having HPV are minimal, that it often takes years for healthy cells to turn problematic therefore i may not have gotten it from AP at all, etc. my rational brain is on overload trying to fight my emotional brain. i'm so scared to tell H that the test even came back weird, bc i know his brain is going to go to the place of, "she cheated and got a disease". but then again, keeping this to myself is really hard as well.

my plan right now is that i have an appt with the obgyn next week, and am not going to tell anybody until after the appt. so im stewing, between now and next tuesday. AIERFAUFIOJAWEFLJ!!

ok, thanks for reading. any support or advice is appreciated :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2008
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 2:43pm
Hi Iddy (((hugs))). My pleasure helping out. I was wanting to tell you that has happened, BS coming over here and sometimes lecturing. I actually reported a post. That has been happening more than it should, Iddy. I did want to say that an EAS poster did post of the BS board and that ruffled feathers a bit. Would hate to see someone get banned for violating TOS.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 3:26pm

Well, you did the right thing. All we can do is report them. Had I seen it, this is what the CMs tell me to do too. It's out of my hands. The higher ups take care of board disruptions. Us little CLs don't have the power some of you think we do. ;-)

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2007
Mon, 07-19-2010 - 4:59pm

Hi existentialist


I think it's up to you if you want to tell your H at this point. You may want to wait till more conclusive results come in. As others have pointed out also this could have been from many years ago. Sometimes it takes time to show symptoms.


I had this happen when i was 22. I'm saying this so others can avoid going through

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2010
Tue, 07-20-2010 - 9:50am

thank you blue belle; i'm SO sorry you experienced such a trauma. im going for my appt today and am feeling much more relaxed about it. i didn't realize just how many of my friends had been through this--i asked around, and it seems i'm one of the only ones i know who HASNT had an abnormal pap! all of my friends are doing fine now...so i'm trying to stay positive.

also, fyi, i DID tell H i was being re eval'ed for some potential abnormal cells, and of course, he was totally cool. he actually told me about some of HIS female friends who went through this, and he was like "well, i'm sure you'll be fine, let me know how it goes, but i hear this is very normal".

also, for whoever was kind enough to delete the judgmental/lecture-y posts, THANK YOU! i didn't even see them, but they would have gotten me really riled up. what is the BS board? wasn't sure what that was referring to.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-24-2008
Tue, 07-20-2010 - 10:48am

Glad you have your H support. Most turn out to be nothing. I had an abnormal pap smear years ago. It turned out being a bacterial vaginal problem.

The BS board means the Betrayed Spouses board. They aren't supposed to be on here and we don't post on their board. If a post is deleted for profanity or stuff like that, their membership can be on the line.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2007
Tue, 07-20-2010 - 11:52am

It's amazing how alone we feel when something like this happens. It's hard to know who to talk about it with, but when you did you found out you are not so different at all :)


I'm glad your H had a positive response. Sounds like he will be the support you need.

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