Giving more than you ever got back...
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Giving more than you ever got back...
| Mon, 12-14-2009 - 10:32am |
Dear Enders,
I was reading the posts this morning and saw a pattern that I think we need to address. Caribu wrote: "why should I feel sad, he

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Ill admit, Ive been on both sides here. My 1st A, I was the taker...the more he gave the more I took because why not? I felt I deserved it all...the material things, the love, the attention. He proved over and over to me that he truely loved me. I ended the A because after awhile the guilt of what I was doing to him just got to me; I did care for him but he always loved me more than what I could have ever possible given. That A was all about me and my selfish needs and he got hurt.
Then karma came around with my last A and I was the one who kept on giving and proving my love over and over again. He could do whatever
All I can say is Oh my God - yes.
The reasoning being, I guess, was that the more nice things I did and said, the sooner he'd have this epiphany and realise I was The One.
Pfft. *rolls eyes*
Edited 1/3/2010 3:13 pm ET by classy01
In the beginning of the A, we were both givers. But that didn't last.
Pretty soon I became the only giver and he took all he could get.
All my "I love you's" and "I miss you's".
I listened to him for hours when he had medical problems.
As soon as he got out of the hospital, I was there with fruit baskets and cards.
I never once forgot his birthday. Of course he did. And when I reminded him "it's my birthday today", he apologized grinning. But do you think he came by in the afternoon? No it was more important for him to surf the internet that day.
Well I am done with it. No one is going to get a piece of me unless he gives at least as much as I am giving. (and no I am not talking about presents!)
Unfortunately it still feels as if the xAP has my heart :(
Iddy, thanks for asking this. This question has to make every AP pause and think about their situation. Of course, if you are still truly fogged in, you won't be able to answer this truthfully. I love the "the person who loves the least has the most power". That says it all. Sadly, it's a game of cat and mouse.
In the first year or so of my affair, we both gave quite a bit, but I really took top billing.
Thanks bandk, your reply has helped me this morning.
Yes count me in....
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