A glimpse of the future...
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| Mon, 01-03-2005 - 8:49am |
Just remembering something that was said at the New Years party I was at...
I was talking about this party from last year with a few people and a story came up where a girl I know had kind of been flirting with another married fellow I know. He was a real gentleman about it and it ended up being just a funny moment. XOM was standing there and basically said "I would have gone for it". At that moment I really got the creeps thinking that I'm probably not as special as I had thought I was and that he's probably a total womanizer. Had I ended up with this guy I could never have really trusted him. He travels alot and works long hours, has lots of money and probably many opportunities - I'm not sure what he would do and what he wouldn't, but I would have always wondered.

You stated something I've felt for a very long time. I think he will go on to have another A down the line. He seem to crave female companionship, not necessary sexual, but an ego-driven need to know he can still get an attractive womans attention.
He knows I don't trust him, and trust was the unlying cause for me to finally let go. With my H, I have total trust in him and therefore, I have peace of mind. My suspicions were driving me crazy. I wanted to stop worrying what he was doing or who he may be flirting with. He said the demise of the R was my fault, because I can't find a way to trust him...and I say it was HIS fault because he's proven time and time again, he NEEDS to be around women and that one woman would never be enough for him.
So I know what you mean,..I had felt "special" at one time, but over the past year or so, saw and heard things that led me to feel that perhaps I was just the unfortunate one that fell hard for him, and was willing to see him on the side.