Go back to lurking, pls. GRRRRR!
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| Tue, 03-16-2010 - 12:52pm |
Alrighty, Girls.
I'm off my meds, so brace up.
This is an ENDING board. Not an I'm-thinking-about-ending board.
You've been lurking for, um, _how_ long??? I've said this over and over....THERE IS NOTHING NEW UNDER THE SUN! What the heck are you doing while lurking; are you actually _reading_ the posts? Or are you just staring blankly at the gd monitor??? Go back one year, two years, three years.... over and over, the same stories, the same advice. Ok, so we all do it... we all get on this board and for the most part our first post is "how do I end this" cry, whine, confusion and despair abound! BUT, the second, third, fourth posts are NOT still "how do I end this?" and they are not supposed to be "I slipped, slipped, fell, slipped, and went back to the A." woe is me, why do I keep doing this..... and so on and so forth.
I am getting a little, ok, A LOT, irritated that lately I cannot come to my support board for uplifting and encouraging post. If y'all are not going to get on the stick and begin to get your shiz together, then go back to MAS or wherever. You girls KNOW what you have to do to be a part of this board, to begin to heal, to get your lives back on track --- SO DO IT! or, kindly, stop wasting everyone's time. This board has all the tools and support a person needs to end their A, but if this board is NOT helping you for some reason, why be on it?
I know I'm supposed to just ignore the posts that don't resonate with me -- I know I'm supposed to offer only loving encouragement --- Well, I'm stuck! I find only 1 out of 10 posts that resonate with me, and the only loving encouragement I can muster is to KICK SOME BUTT. If I had the patience of an angel on valium, like Iddy and the Vets, I'd probably keep my mouth shut. But, I've been here only four months and I've NEVER been good at filtering. I'm the loudmouth of the group; sorry if it offends, but I'm going to stand behind this rant because I think it's worth saying and my motivation is coming from the right place: I want healing for everyone on this board - I want the new-enders to get what they need to move forward.
sigh. I'm done.
Dee

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Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Woah! Well I'm sure I posted some messages where I was feeling discouraged after ENDING my A. And I am very thankful for being able to do that because the advice I received here from all of the wonderful ladies is what got me through. I would hate for anybody to feel like they can't post their feelings of sadness and confusion so they can attempt to get some clarity from those who have had the same feelings upon ENDING.
Dee, I can understand your frustration when it comes to those who continue with the madness, however, just like drug addicts, sometimes it takes more that once!
Baby Girl,
You got the gist of my rant, just like you get the reason for this board. We sometimes whine, sometimes we slip, sometimes we're weak... that is all OK and that is why we come to the board for strength and help. right? None of us is perfect --- but we're moving forward and getting better! Don't apologize for your journey, however rough, as long as you're an Ender (and you ARE! congratulations on 14 days NC!!!)
xoxox
Dee
Dee,
Yup--I'm in. I too have to say this is an endings board. It has been very hard for me to come here and hear some say they CAN'T STOP. Yes, you can--and you need to--and we can all say why till we are blue in the face.
God knows it took me long enough to "see the light" but I did the hard work, continue to do a ton of therapy and introspection and am "clean and sober". Does that mean I don't feel like sh*t some days, miss the hell out of him, want to cry, scream and have some pity-----of course I do. BUT, we come here to not say HOW do I get out--but simply I HAVE and now I need help. ):
Ending means ending. Not "what if, or maybe". We all knows A's are destructive, rotten business that place us squarely in fantasy. Thinking you might be one of the "lucky ones" simply means you are still in fantasy land.
This is hard work for us all. But it is made easier somehow, by knowing we are all in the same boat.
Hugs to all,
LL
Oh, I agree with you. So we're on the same page and there is no confusion. It takes more than once for a lot of us - did me! And it's a tough, tough road! I can't recall a single Ender who got it right straight out of the gate. oh, hells no. We wallowed and fussed and questioned the Vets and Leaders. We needed to be cyberhugged and sometimes butt-kicked.... right? all of us. And that isn't going to change, nor should it. My only point is that Enders are ENDERS, not maybe-enders. Our goal is to _move forward_, even with an occasional step back or slip on the way, we're still moving forward. I want every single ending-lurker to come here and feel safe to post about fears, pain, discouragement and know that they will be supported and loved and encouraged -- as I was, as you were. Even the confused lurkers who are not volunteering for an ending but need a little help realizing that they really DO want an end... heck, that was ME! remember? I needed tough love right away! Thank God for E1, Iddy, and so many others.
I am so thankful for you on this board, Actingasif!
xo
Dee
Dee's off her meds and
Well, you all have said so much. I don't have to add anything else :-)
But I have to say, there are times I read some of the posts and I just want to shake the poster - Girl, wake up !!!!
<>
I was swamped at work today and haven't been able to get on board, so to speak. ;-)
~Iddy~
Iddy,
I'm sorry. I will not incite rallies anymore. I will direct my post individually, or not at all.
Back on meds,
Dee
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