gobble gobble gobble

Avatar for wClarity
Community Leader
Registered: 11-04-2012
gobble gobble gobble
Wed, 11-21-2012 - 10:57pm

Hey Everyone Smile

I imagine most of you are busy getting ready for Turkey Day.  Me, I'm snuggled up here on the couch watching Gone With the Wind.  The scene is up where Scarlett fashions a dress from heavy green velvet curtains, to go see Rhett to try to get money for taxes on Tara.  I get the giggles because it reminds of Carol Burnett who, when playing Scarlett, comes down the stairs wearing curtains...with the big rod still in them...sticking out beyond her shoulders...too funny.

Tomorrow, MH will cook his usual feast.  He does all the cooking, and I do all the cleaning up...it's the perfect arrangement.  The kids live Colorado so it will be just the two of us...and football!  Ever since I bartended at a local VFW and started to learn the game...and of course because the Patriot's were awesome...I started to enjoy it.  

I hope you all enjoy your day.  Stay in the present...and love the ones you're with.



Community Leader,

Ending an Affair Support Board

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2011
Thu, 11-22-2012 - 8:03am

HI Clarity-

I just watched Gone WIth the Wind last weekend with my daughter.  What a classic.  Although she did not like the not so happily ever after ending.

Today is the first Thanksgiving that I will not be with my kids.  They will be with their Dad today and also for the weekend.  Shared custody is hard but I am getting used to it.  I am spending the day with my family, aunts and uncles, and Grandparents.  I am blessed to have so many people that I love and who love me for me.

I will stay in the moment.  No longer thinking of XAP at all.  He shows up in a dream every once in a awhile but even that is rare. I never imagined I would feel this distant from the A. 

Happy Thanksgiving to all!

Formerly heartacheafter7years
Avatar for ratherbeme
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2010
Thu, 11-22-2012 - 8:17am


Today marks 91 weeks of NC for me.  Yes I am still counting. Getting close to two years but still have triggers of remorse and questions that will always go unanswered. I accept them easier today than ever before. I fought acceptance for so long. I know not why. I have no answer to why we hang on to things that hurt us.

Thanksgiving is almost a storybook time for me. I did go to grandmother’s house when I was young, actually until I was an adult and still remember the joy of family, of Uncles and Aunts, Cousins and all who gathered to enjoy the fruits of labor of people’s favorite recipes. Today, so many years later I will still enjoy them, as they have been handed down and my wife is a good cook and recreates them year after year. Today the recipes are more hers than belonging to others but still the memory lingers on.

Today I am the grandparent. Today I,………..WE host the dinner.  Today we will have all the straggly family that is left here for turkey, and the favorite foods that bring back so many happy memories. There will be many uncles and aunts, family and friends and at the end of the day of good food, football and such I will go to bed happy.

Today I will give thanks just like my Uncle did and I will mean it. Every word of it. I have written it down and refined it for a couple of days. 

I still have many things to be thankful for. I am thankful that I still have my family, together and whole. 

I am thankful for a wife that takes care of me. If there is one thing that I can mention that she has done for me after all these years is that she does a good job of that.

I am thankful for a daughter who has been a joy in life to me. I am thankful that she has married a man that loves her and is responsible. I wish he and I were closer, and I wish that we saw more eye to eye on things, but we see and agree on the important things. Family. He is a good husband and father.

I am thankful for a grand-daughter that makes me happy every time, and I mean EVERY time, I see her. She may be high maintenance , but she is a joy in my life.

I am thankful for a new grandchild that is on its way. More about that in another six months.

I am grateful for friendship of the many people who are my real friends. I have been blessed. Not just acquaintances, but real honest to goodness friends. I never missed having real friends when I didn’t have them. You can’t miss what isn’t there.

One person in particular I am grateful for has had devastating news this week. He has three months to six months left.  I am grateful that I met him and his wife, and have felt a true camaraderie with him as a brother for these last few years. I will miss his humor, and friendship. I am grateful that he is accepting of something he has no control over. Another question to never be answered.  Why???

I am thankful for all you who come here and read, and understand what I try to pass on. The ramblings of an old man.

I am also thankful for those who patiently listened, and offered advice to me when I fought so hard to ignore it.

Life is a truly a gift. I don’t know too many people who live it more fully than I do. I enjoy every day. It is what you make of it.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all.

We only miss what could have been. I know I don't miss what it really was.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2011
Thu, 11-22-2012 - 7:51pm

Thanks for this, Rather. And happy Thanksgiving to you.

Today one of my friends pulled me aside in my kitchen and said to me, You know, one year ago, remember? You were a wreck. Look at how much better things are today, and you never would have believed it then.

And she is right. But I would never have gotten here without you all.