Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
I think everyone also needs to understand that SUPPORT doesn't necessarily mean you are going to always hear what you want to hear. The name of the board is Ending Affair Support - hence the support we receive is for the goal of ENDING an affair. The vets and the tweeners have all been exactly where we've been. I for one, trust their advice and guidance.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
I’ve mentioned on here before that I think my T was on the verge of getting a BS buzzer (and no that does not stand for Betrayed Spouse, Big Success or Bubba Smith) just for my sessions. I think there were times she wanted to baby shake me. If she didn’t smoke, she probably started after my sessions.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
I have to admit that my compass was a little jacked up when I 1st got here back in November but those of you that had BTDT were so patient with me. I tried so hard to go NC for so long but couldnt, then once I did.....the fog started to go away. It was hard to see that compass in all that fog and Im more of a country girl..not a living off the land kind of chick who can follow the direction by where the moss is growing. I definately would have led Lewis and Clark astray with my remedial navigation skills. Now I bet though that I could have sniffed out and led them to any thrift store, Chick Fil A or TJ Maxx, Im kinda talented like that.
It takes determination to end your affair. You may not want to end it but you know that you HAVE to..there is just no other way. And thats where EAS comes in. Once the roller coaster starts to make you want to throw up...its time to get of and
One of the greatest strengths of THIS board (IMHO) ... is that support doesn't mean unconditional acceptance of destructive behaviours to self and others.
Those behaviours stem from faulty, and distorted thoughts processes and when we share our stories here, we do so (it seems) from a common understanding that the insights of others' will assist us in re-calibrating North.
This board does not take a 'harm-reduction approach' to ending an affair ... you are either out of your affair (or on the verge) or you are in it ... there is no gray here, and thankfully this has been the key to success for me in finally putting my affair in my past.
TU.
LC/NC since April 14, 2010
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it." — Maya Angelou
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Without a doubt, you have acted as my compass from day one.
Thank you for taking the time to express so well, the intentions of this board.
You have SO many remarkable gifts that you generously share with us.
I am so grateful to/for you,
TU.
LC/NC since April 14, 2010
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
Thanks E1 :)
I think everyone also needs to understand that SUPPORT doesn't necessarily mean you are going to always hear what you want to hear. The name of the board is Ending Affair Support - hence the support we receive is for the goal of ENDING an affair. The vets and the tweeners have all been exactly where we've been. I for one, trust their advice and guidance.
Bodhi
Thanks TU,
Now how do you say in French: The lady in the red dress her panties are not in a wad!
Big hugs,
E1
Whether you think you can or you think you can’t you are probably right.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Good addition to the thread Bodhi,
<>
I’ve mentioned on here before that I think my T was on the verge of getting a BS buzzer (and no that does not stand for Betrayed Spouse, Big Success or Bubba Smith) just for my sessions. I think there were times she wanted to baby shake me. If she didn’t smoke, she probably started after my sessions.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Hi E1,
Now why didnt i think of
New Choices, New Chapter,
New Challenges,
and me too... I am very grateful for the help, guidance and understadning,
I may have taken a while to get there.... but im here and staying..
Sunbeam x
All,
I have to admit that my compass was a little jacked up when I 1st got here back in November but those of you that had BTDT were so patient with me. I tried so hard to go NC for so long but couldnt, then once I did.....the fog started to go away. It was hard to see that compass in all that fog and Im more of a country girl..not a living off the land kind of chick who can follow the direction by where the moss is growing. I definately would have led Lewis and Clark astray with my remedial navigation skills. Now I bet though that I could have sniffed out and led them to any thrift store, Chick Fil A or TJ Maxx, Im kinda talented like that.
It takes determination to end your affair. You may not want to end it but you know that you HAVE to..there is just no other way. And thats where EAS comes in. Once the roller coaster starts to make you want to throw up...its time to get of and
It is so true.
One of the greatest strengths of THIS board (IMHO) ... is that support doesn't mean unconditional acceptance of destructive behaviours to self and others.
Those behaviours stem from faulty, and distorted thoughts processes and when we share our stories here, we do so (it seems) from a common understanding that the insights of others' will assist us in re-calibrating North.
This board does not take a 'harm-reduction approach' to ending an affair ... you are either out of your affair (or on the verge) or you are in it ... there is no gray here, and thankfully this has been the key to success for me in finally putting my affair in my past.
TU.
LC/NC since April 14, 2010
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
Edited 8/13/2010 10:44 am ET by transcendingus
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
Again TU, perfectly stated!
Have A HAPPY DAY!
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