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| Thu, 10-21-2004 - 10:53am |
Bumping up the post from earlier.. dipss had some good questions that I have been
thinking about also..
Nostalgia is nipping at my heels
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message #: 14411.6 in response to 14411.5
from: dipss
to: meg_at_peace
date: 8:02 am
replies: 6
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Ok, so you a triggered a thought.
I know it doesnt matter but....
Do you think they have those moments of nostalgia as well or do you think their brains are wired differently.
xMM once said to me when we were once trying to end things that it was hard for him but he doesnt allow himself to wallow in those thoughts.
So what do you think???
xo!
Dipss

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Bear,
You have no idea the cloud you just lifted from my head. There have been so many unanswered questions looming over me for the past 2 months. I was in so much pain. It hurt when he ended things. Then when he said he didn't love me anymore and just wanted a 'sexual' relationship, it felt like my heart had been ripped out and run through a shredder!
As a woman, I just didn't understand how he could go from being so in love...to not caring at all. Sometimes the game doesn't end even after the breakup. We have had NC since last Thursday. My choice. Last time I tried NC it lasted 9 days before he sent the "Hey - hope all is well" email. Today is his bday and I have promised myself that no matter what, I will keep NC. Hard though....really hard.
Funny how you mentioned a wall. He has told me in the past that he does that. He told me how afraid he is of getting hurt the way he was once years ago, so he usually puts up a wall when he starts to get close to someone. Said he repress his emotions and blocks people out - "that's what I do, that's where I'm comfortable". I never really believed it...until he did it to me. It's difficult to watch someone you love so much, just seem to pick up and move on while you are still hurting so much. It's so confusing...
The show I am working on right now is bringing up alot of nostalgia. The two characters are so much like myself and XOM. I'm trying to use it in my favor as a way of healing (as someone suggested). But I have my days when I can't even look at the script w/o crying.
Again, Bear - thank you so much for your words!
Diva
Bear -
Anything I can do??
Diva
Diva
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