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Happy to report
| Fri, 03-11-2005 - 12:23pm |
I haven't even had to fight back any tears since the other day when I couldn't stop crying. I'm friends with xMM and we don't discuss the A at all. How I think of things now is that I have a "crush" on him, like you'd have for someone in high school, for lack of a better description. I'm slowly getting my feelings in check. They're dissolving from that intensity that we had before down to a dull ache right now. In time, I am sure that I will still miss him, but will be with someone else and not "in love" with him anymore. I'm thinking of this like any ex-boyfriend. It took me a while to get over my ex of 5 years, but I got over him. He has a new girlfriend and we are still friends. I think you can be friends once you are no longer in love with your ex or have those feelings any longer. I never thought that I would get over the 5-yr boyfriend, but I did. I have to believe that this will be no different.
Signatures On
| Fri, 03-11-2005 - 2:04pm |
I am glad that you are having a good day and feel so much better. I think that you still need to be really careful though. It dosen't take much to send you back. Stay strong and start doing some of those things for yourself that you have been putting off.
| Fri, 03-11-2005 - 2:43pm |
I realize that the only reason I am doing well is because he hasn't been making advances. Even testing him by going out to his truck the other day, he didn't do anything. The real test will be if he starts to come at me again. Somehow, this time it's been different, so I don't see that happening. I've had the conversations in my head if he does, though, about what I will tell him as to why we can never do that again, and why I can't ever do that again. I'm trying to prepare myself for it if it happens.
