HATE MYSELF
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HATE MYSELF
| Mon, 03-21-2005 - 8:54am |
I have been trying to end a 5 year A for the last 2 years. I did really good this past weekend, I did not call him, he called and left messages to see me and I was strong. yeah I missed him but I had self control! WHAT HAPPENED? This morning he called I picked up and he just tore me up emotionally I can not even stop crying to get ready for work. He INSULTED me told me that (my waitressing job I used to have) I used to dance and take my clothes off for money, told me I was a prostitute told me he went out with a new girl yesterday told me he could care less if I wanted him anymore he will not be sad. MAN he just tore my heart out chewed it up and spit it on the floor I am hurting so bad. What happened to the I miss you's I love you. MAN I am a mess. I am so angry for allowing him to rip me apart, then he tells me he will make an appointment for me later to talk to him in person. I need an appointment all right but not with him, I need to get therepy. I am calling today I can not do this anymore! How can he do this and have a normal day, I could never do this to someone and not feel any remorse. Here I am crying my eyes out and his day goes on as normal. I AM SOOOO HURT! I should be angry but what he said just hurt so bad!I have been so good to this man I have helped him so much how could he do this? And it was almost like he was enjoying it, is that possible??

You Shouldn't hate yourself... HATE HIM. See this as a widow of what kind of man he really is . Take your time to cry about it then use your anger to move on without him. You deserved better. I hope you find it.
Take care
Ash
Man, that's so cold, he went right for the jugular didn't he,..telling you he went out with a new girl! Seems to be that power struggle that is so common when trying to end these things. He's protecting himself by belittling you. Why? Because it appeared to him that you were being strong and had the upper hand on trying to end the A, so he wants to be the one that's calling the shots again. It hurts less that way.
I guess I should feel fortunate that my XMM never felt the need to verbally hurt me, and believe me, I've said plenty to him. He always told me he bites his tongue rather than say things that he can't take back.
I know you feel miserable over the things he said, but I truly believe it's not really how he feels about you, but rather the fact that you had the upper hand..and so he's finding his own way of getting that back. Telling you he saw a new girl was saying "you won't see me, so now I'm trying to find ways to hurt you back".
Hugs to ya, hang in there sweetie
F2M
This pile of DOG CRAP is trying to break you so that he will have total control and you will be his personal free prostitute, it is all about POWER you showed him you have and he wants to take it away from you, DON'T LET HIM.
I don't care how you may have had to make a living your still way to good for that bucket of hamster vomit walking around like a man, that visious attact tells you all you need to know about this SICK PATHETIC SHELL OF A MAN, he's the one that needs to be seeing a shrink.
You are way to good for this LOSER and HE knows it, tell him were to stuff his appointment, your not at his beck and call any more, he is NOT the master and you the servant.
Flip him the bird and tell him were to take his tiny little penis.
Free
Fooled
It does not matter what you did or did not do, nothing gives him the right to treat you like that, what he said was all about him and had NOTHING to do with you PERIOD.
The man is a PIG and just plain NASTY a USER and at least a verbal ABUSER, I still say FLIP HIM THE BIRD and tell him were to GO.
Free
i agree with FREE , he is trying to play u girlfriend, this is sign for u to run and not look back, i know it hurts but how long will u let yourself take this kind of crap from him
u said u been trying to 2 yrs to break the A, he is holding on for sex, thats the truth
take care,
max
I'm so sorry that his horrible man said these things to you.
But ever time you think of caving in and contacting him or missing him, think about what he said to you. How he said things knowing it would hurt you badly. Maybe it's time to change your phone number, and send him a letter or email ending it once and for all.
No one, absolutely no one has a right to be cruel to another like this. I'm a little concerned this "man" is unstable. Be very careful, but end it once and for all.
Wishing you peace and strength.
AE