This haunts me...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-08-2009
This haunts me...
3
Wed, 02-10-2010 - 8:54am
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-09-2010
Wed, 02-10-2010 - 10:47am

I think it makes much courage to do what your friend did, and if he's happy with the decision that he made then I applaud him. MM/MW rarely take the dramatic steps that your friend did and naturally people are going to be upset and disagree with their actions because of their differing values, but luckily others opinions dont count when it comes to matters of the heart. Eventually everyone will come around and accept their actions or they'll just cut ties with this new couple. And if people can't be happy for them, then they don't need to have connections with unsupporting friends and family. But I'm glad that he realized who he truly loved and he was able to make that transition and not continue to live a double life hurting both women. It's unfortunate that his W is hurting but in the end someone has to be left behind.


Each A is different and I dont think that you should get your hopes up thinking that your guy will take the same dramatic steps as your friends. You can't force the guy to leave, he has to want to do this.(Not that I think your

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
Wed, 02-10-2010 - 10:56am
What your friends will realize after the newness of their soul mate theory wears off and the honeymoon is over is that committing to a M is not about being soul mates. It's about living an honest life and going through bad times and good times and making a commitment to be faithful. If you will look into your life, you are surrounding by deceitful ppl who are claiming that their lies and cheating are because they have met their soul mate. Your life right now is intertwined in dishonesty and based on hurting someone else to fulfill your own desires. The dust will settle in your friend's soul mate relationship and real life will enter. The two of them have proven that they don't handle commitment too well. It will be interesting to see if they are not running again in another ten years. I think instead of hoping that your MM leaves his W and the two of you can run off into the sunset, you need to realize that very rarely do MM leave their W, and most M that start out as an A don't end well. Happiness at the expense of someone else's pain is not a good thing. Living an honest life with integrity feels better than finding a soul mate, but you can only do that when you have cleared up the garbage in your life which made you think cheating was the right thing to do in the first place.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2006
Wed, 02-10-2010 - 12:19pm
So his happiness is way more important than anyone else's?
Onward and upward.