Having a hard day of NC
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Having a hard day of NC
| Fri, 10-01-2010 - 2:34pm |
Been trying to go NC for, well, a long time. We were down to LC, then last week had this great conversation. It was all fine, I was at work, so it was over email, but after his final message I got one that said and by the way, I love you. My first reaction was, no you don't! But then my eyes welled up and my wall came down b/c I miss him - and this is a EA not a PA but it's been almost two years. I was kind of a mess in the head for a day or so, then I got over it, but like clockwork, a week or so goes by and I'm dying to call/write/something. But, I am determined this time NOT to, I am feeling it I guess that this may be it and I know I just have to get through the hard part this time. Anyhow, thought it would be better to vent on here than to contact him! So thanks for listening :)

Hanvan,
I am a little confused. Let me see if I got this right. You ended with X EA partner, and went LC? I assume you don't work together and that is not the reason for LC, rather you just got a bad start to ending the A and chose LC over NC, right? Now, you want to go NC and are struggling with it, although you've been successful for a week?
Ok... this is what you do. You DON'T break NC. No matter what; that is not an option. Now, how to feel _better_ during this time?? THAT is where you can get busy: journal your feelings so that you have an outlet, contact a friend for support if you can, read the Healing Library on this board, stop yourself from obsessing by distracting yourself with positive activities. Practice positive affirmations. BLOCK AND WALK. If you don't know what that means, you'll find the definition here -- about a gagillion times.
I'm sorry, I have to run! But the board is about to go read-only for a few days and I didn't want to leave you hanging!! Please, please don't give up on yourself and don't underestimate how well you can do if you only put your mind and heart to it.
Prayers for strength!
Dee
Hi Dee, thanks for your response! Yes, you are correct in the first paragraph on everything... don't work together, chose LC over NC, etc. Thank you for your encouragement and reminding me of all the things I need to get busy with to avoid thinking of him. The funny thing is that I am actually super busy right now, but it's all work and moving related, so nothing fun. Need to make sure I take some time out this weekend.
Thanks so much again, I really appreciate your words and your prayers!