Mickey, if you're not comfortable saying anything to him (I know I won't be myself), just don't take his calls. Men in general do not respond well to words, but they do respond to actions. You may tell him 1000 times not to call you, but if you answer his calls, he'll continue calling, thinking you're just saying it and don't really mean it. But if you just won't answer, he'll get it much quicker. Don't feel bad about answering this time, he caught you off guard.
I dont think youre making a big deal out of one phone, I think its important to recognize the behaviors so we can better ourselves and learn from them;more importantly grow from them.
It sounds like to me that youre still loving with youre heart and not with your head. Thats is hard to change or even turn off for awhile. I know this cause Im the same way, I have a tenancy to make decisions based on my emotions and not facts. But for the sake of our emotional health sometimes it just hurts less to use your head.
When you have had enough, you won't be afraid to be mean. You won't worry about hurting his feelings. You won't care if he is sorry, sad, horny, mad, indifferent. It won't matter because your heart will be tired, emotionally exhausted and begging for a break. You won't give it a second thought to say Screw you! See ya! Have a nice life!
Only you know when you hit that point. You will know when that times comes. Question is...how much are you going to hurt yourself to get there? His hurt doesn't matter..mainly cause there isn't any and also because it is his not yours.
Hang in there hun! It will all come together one day and BAM! That will be it. You will walk away and say no more. No more waiting for the phone to ring, an email, a text. You won't wait. You will be doing your own thing that does not include wasting one minute on him. One day you will be there...
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Mickey,
I am kind of surprised by your response about him calling. Your post almost sounds calmed or comforted by his call.
Mickey -
I tend to agree with Kristin's observation on this. How did you feel while you were talking to him?
You're right....think it did give me a 'fix' to an extent.
I
Mickey, if you're not comfortable saying anything to him (I know I won't be myself), just don't take his calls. Men in general do not respond well to words, but they do respond to actions. You may tell him 1000 times not to call you, but if you answer his calls, he'll continue calling, thinking you're just saying it and don't really mean it.
But if you just won't answer, he'll get it much quicker. Don't feel bad about answering this time, he caught you off guard.
Good luck.
Plus, I think half of what they love is the control they have
I dont think youre making a big deal out of one phone, I think its important to recognize the behaviors so we can better ourselves and learn from them;more importantly grow from them.
It sounds like to me that youre still loving with youre heart and not with your head. Thats is hard to change or even turn off for awhile. I know this cause Im the same way, I have a tenancy to make decisions based on my emotions and not facts. But for the sake of our emotional health sometimes it just hurts less to use your head.
>just don't take his calls.<
Better yet
Thanks....I now have 2 numbers programmed in my phone that I know are from his new office...so I just won't pick up.
Today's a tough day, as I just quit my job.
Girlie girl,
When you have had enough, you won't be afraid to be mean. You won't worry about hurting his feelings. You won't care if he is sorry, sad, horny, mad, indifferent. It won't matter because your heart will be tired, emotionally exhausted and begging for a break. You won't give it a second thought to say Screw you! See ya! Have a nice life!
Only you know when you hit that point. You will know when that times comes. Question is...how much are you going to hurt yourself to get there? His hurt doesn't matter..mainly cause there isn't any and also because it is his not yours.
Hang in there hun! It will all come together one day and BAM! That will be it. You will walk away and say no more. No more waiting for the phone to ring, an email, a text. You won't wait. You will be doing your own thing that does not include wasting one minute on him. One day you will be there...
Take care,
Hope
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