He lives so close..how do I end this??

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-13-2009
He lives so close..how do I end this??
6
Fri, 09-04-2009 - 7:23am
Hi. I've posted on MAS a few times but really need to end this. No, I don't want to at all but I know it has to be done. I'm just putting off the inevitable. Long story short, I've known him for years. We're both married with children. I recently moved a few houses down from him in the same neighborhood. Our families do things together all the time.I told him in June how I felt, he said he felt the same way and the emails, texts and meetings started. We've been intimate 4 times and it's been great. He tells me he loves me..always says the right things. Neither one of us has any intention of leaving our spouse, though. Fast forward to last week - he's been having panic attacks. He's very stressed and I'm sure one of the reasons is seeing me and hiding it from his wife. So when he has these he's in bed 75% of the time and hasn't been able to email me. Which is completely understandable. Today is Friday..Monday he emailed me but was distant. We talked about ending it. He says he loves me and doesn't want to but he needs to get better before he can see me. So I told him to take his time and get better and in the meantime we need to stop 'this'. He says he doesn't want to. His emails go back and forth. He's confusing. How do I end this living so close to him knowing I have to see him???
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2008
Fri, 09-04-2009 - 10:57am

I haven't been on here in a while but something compelled me today and I think your post was the reason.


There are a few of us on here who had A's with neighbors.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Fri, 09-04-2009 - 2:05pm

i agree with ISS. we've both had d-days. and we are never safe from one.


first off: if he is SO unhappy, why is he 'hiding' your A from his W? why doesn't he do something about it? because he does not want to.

CL-Lovely Starr

"No memory of having starred; atones for later disregard; or keeps the end from being h

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Fri, 09-04-2009 - 2:07pm

ISS,


we've both lived thru the hell of d-day. we know how hard it is and you coming here today to write about it was a godsend. thank you so much.


as you have said: 'love yourself enough.' and you have: hugs to your success-


ls

CL-Lovely Starr


"No memory of having starred; atones for later disregard; or keeps the end from being hard."

CL-Lovely Starr

"No memory of having starred; atones for later disregard; or keeps the end from being h

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2009
Sat, 09-05-2009 - 7:40am

Hi ilovethemboth,

I am also one of the "A-neighbors" here on EAS.
It's very difficult, that's for sure. I also posted
about this on this forum, and there is some very
helpful advice. There's a thread called "what if he
is your neighbor" and there are several more threads
to be found (all in "General") with the word Neighbor
in the subject line. I think it will be good for you
if you try to find them.

Hugs
HTGO

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-29-2008
Sat, 09-05-2009 - 10:18am

Thank you LS!


Yes, I have come to realize that the only reason I allowed such a toxic situation/person into my life was that I didn't love myself enough.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2008
Wed, 09-09-2009 - 3:13pm

ISS:


CL-Lovely Starr

"No memory of having starred; atones for later disregard; or keeps the end from being h