HEART ATTACK!
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HEART ATTACK!
| Mon, 03-07-2011 - 3:10pm |
OMFG. I'll be damnmed. MFer just emailed me from another acct. Its been almost FIVE effing months!!! He's gonna be in my town soon and was asking advice where to stay (yes I read it). Really?? What a total douche bag. He lived here. He can find a place to stay. I believe he's computer savvy enough to figure out a place to stay all by his big boy self. OMG I am ANGRY!! Not feeling hurt in the least. Just royally pissed off. So he wants me to know he's gonna be in my neighborhood. Am I supposed to be grateful and drop to my knees before him?? GACK. I never thought I'd hear from him. What an arrogant a-hole. I can't believe how angry I am. Oh, BTW, I did not and will not respond. Aaaaaaaaaaagh. Piece of $hit.

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This is where I am at I believe as well, I am trying to sift through my feelings towards my xh and the ways I allowed myself to be treated. It hurts like I cannot even explain clearly and I am angry as heck at myself that I allow myself to view myself in such a poor way. Somedays I just want things to go back to normal and if I am proud of anything at this point it is that I am taking my new normal and seeing it changing frequently and fighting hard to stay the course. I believe we still have a ways to go on this path and I have the utmost faith in you that you will succeed in reaching indifference and forgiveness. Big hugs to you alwayst:)
Always2 ... how about Always1Now.
I love you woman, and I am so proud of the growth you have shown, and the honesty you have the courage to share.
As we live, so we learn & may we each have the courage to share (as you have) our lessons through our own struggles to succeed.
My wisdom IS DIRECTLY PROPORTIONAL TO THE AMOUNT OF SCREWING UP I DID (:
Much love to all,
TU.
Always
You are my hero. I love how you ignored his blatant fishing excuse. But mostly I love that you see that more work is needed.
Im not sure i will EVER get to a point where I couldnt read something I was sent. By anyone!
Maybe one day. For now he is blocked and I am working on me.
Its so true though isnt it that ANY contact from them just regurgitates negative feelings, hence the decision to have no more contact- there is no point in adding unecessary negativity in our lives.
Iggyxxx
Always-
I'm so sorry that he sent you the "Which hotel would be most likely for you to visit me for a night (or half hour) of masochistic behavior?" email.
Hearts, I am LOL at your email translation!!! You are so right about that. Jeeeez. I mean really? HOW TRANSPARENT. Whatever.
So, for an update, I am no longer angry. I pretty much let that go last night. I didn't have one single dream about him. However, I woke up this morning and he was the first thing on my mind. As I went through my morning routine, I thought a lot about him, about myself, about my husband and about my entire life.
I am
TEARS OF JOY FOR YOU.
I LOVE YOU.
YOU ARE AN AMAZING WOMAN.
I AM GLAD TO BE A WITNESS TO and
Hi AT2,
I want to start this reply by saying how proud I am of you and your progress over the past several months. You’ve had a lot of struggles and lots of ups and downs but you did it GF, you ended your A. You’ve had a few wobbles here and there but they were brief and you picked yourself up and dusted yourself off and came out looking brighter and better than before. You most importantly got yourself in T. I cheer that along with all of your milestones! I cheered when you made a decision about you M, even when you thought you were going to end it because you had sat on the friken fence so long, I knew making a decision one way or another was progress. I cheered when you decided to stay in your M. I cheered because you were doing it the right way by being willing to work on you and the M with the support of your H. He was willing to do the necessary work too.
I want nothing more than for you to beat the liven tar out of this A and be successful. You are likeable as anyone can be, have tons of talent and I want to see you soar darn it!
I want you to know I struggled with writing the following. I went back and forth with what to say and how to say it. I struggled because your progress far out shines what I see as a small wobbly. However, there are two important reasons why I think it is important to discuss it.
1)
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
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