Hello all :-) Thoughts to ponder...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Hello all :-) Thoughts to ponder...
10
Thu, 08-27-2009 - 1:57pm

I read LS's post "EXCUSES" and one of her questions was "what excuses did xMM give as to why he wasn't leaving?".

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-07-2009
Thu, 08-27-2009 - 2:21pm

Hello Victory!


It is woderful to hear from you and to know that things are going so well for you and your family.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2009
Thu, 08-27-2009 - 7:01pm

Victory,


"Why he wasn't leaving"?

 

              &n

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2009
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 4:57am

Dear Victory,

It's so nice to hear from you. I have been thinking about you a lot lately because your situation is/ was so similar to mine. As always, you are a voice of hope in a situation that seems impossible.

So thanks for writing :-)

Hugs
HTGO

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 6:22am

Ya right from the beginin he never claimed to want to leave his wife he loved her but they were very diff people then the little slides of how he was gonna divorce

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 11:13am

I hope you are doing okay.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-04-2009
Fri, 08-28-2009 - 12:13pm

Dear Victoryismine,

I am not doing that okay, but I am going on.
xAP continues to pursue me relentlessly (did your xAP
also do this? ) but his wife
will be at home now for a whole week, so that's good.
Plus , it will be better once he starts working again.
I agree with you that xAP is a symptom of a problem in my
life. I have been reading the book "women who love too much"
and it's very good. I also read the Feeling Good book and it
was also VERY good!
Hm, yeah, that's what xAP told me too one day, that my
expectations of him are too high.
Thanks again for writing to me, I always love to hear from you,
you learned so much and I can learn a lot from you.

Hugs
Htgo

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2009
Sat, 08-29-2009 - 7:21am

Victoryismine - I am very interested to know how you stayed "friends" with your Xap. I REALLY would like to be friends with mine.... we work together, have many mutual friends, and even my H loves hanging out with him too...as weird as that is!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-11-2009
Sat, 08-29-2009 - 11:24am

Although you directed your question to Victory, I thought I'd chime in.


I am not familiar with your story, I did an advanced search and see no postings from you other than this so I am going from what I see here.


I too tried the "friends" thing, thinking I just wanted him in my life in some form.

 

              &n

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Sat, 08-29-2009 - 3:12pm

I do not advocate remaining friends with an xAP.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-16-2009
Sun, 08-30-2009 - 5:57am

Okay, I have to start by saying - you are all so helpful!!! GREAT ADVICE and support offered here... I think I will be spending alot of time here over the next while...


Here is a link to a thread in MAS... it explains my situation over two seperate posts over the 2 pages....


http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlmyaffair&msg=55812.1&x=y


And just so you're totally clear on how STUPID I am....


Both me, and my AP's wife are pregnant (yes, I know I'm a monster:( Don't worry- I'm pregnant with my H's baby, and couldn't be more happy about it! Not to kid myself that this would have ever ended in anything but disaster, but that is largely the reason to our A taking the dive it did, when it did... his W got preg, completely unexpected, then the same happened to me a month later! Again, totally unexpected! I actually didn't think I could have children! We are lucky AP didn't get me pregnant, because the timing we had sex was perfect, in that, my cycle would not allow. PHEW. That so could have went the other way though!