Help

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2004
Help
2
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 1:51pm
Its only been a few days NC today. Didnt know that it

would be this hard but im trying to make it day by day.

The hardest part is not letting my kids and H see my

sadness. I work all day and seem to keep my mind of of

him but when I come home that seems to be the hardest

time when I have time to think of him. What do you do

at home to keep yourself from going crazy? I know that this

was the best for both of our families. Really do hope that

this gets easier.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
In reply to: lostnhim
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 5:28pm

As in all other addiction withdrawls, ending the affair is most painful at the beginning.


The issues underneath the pain, i.e., those faults of your marriage that you used to justify your affair, are still looming out there.


The affair drug will wear off and the issues will still need to be addressed and settled.


Can you focus on what needs to be addressed in your marriage and then act on it?


Doing so will also affect your loss......


And open new doors oof opportunities to change your life to what you really want.


Good luck,


cl-nre


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2004
In reply to: lostnhim
Mon, 06-28-2004 - 6:07pm
I know how you feel. The first few days of NC are so hard. I, too, have a H and children. Home is so lonely at times. But it does help to look at your marriage to see what you can salvage there. If your husband loves you, talk to him about ways to make the marriage better. There is a reason you married him in the first place. At least he is there, is hopefully honest, and is a good provider. That is worth its weight in gold if you have been lied to by your ex. I'm afraid it will be a long process but you are in good company. There are tons of us out there who were hoping for something better but it went kaput. Lessons learned. Hope you will end up stronger for it.