Help - day 3

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-17-2010
Help - day 3
11
Mon, 06-21-2010 - 8:32am

I felt like I was doing so well the past 2 days, now it's Monday morning and I am at work and I feel like I'm going to fall apart shortly. It's hard because I own my own business and have only 1 employee (who thankfully is gone today in case I need to) so it's very quiet here. My office is where 95% of our relationship took place also. The big part of what I wanted from him was to be a part of my work - to have that best friend to share everything with. EX wasn't a "business" man so he couldn't really support me in the way I wanted and needed. AP is very prominent and successful and that is part of what I was drawn to in the beginning. It's also dreary here and all I keep picturing is him at the beach. The icing on the cake is that I have to have my cell on all day now too, for business and my kids. It was easier to have it off - to be able think that maybe he's tried to call. With it on, I'll know that he hasn't. And I know that's what I should WANT but it's so very hard.

I've read through all my healing library stuff this morning. I'll re-read it and try to remind myself he's not Mr. Wonderful. I'm doing everything I can to heal. I've even reached out to a couple girlfriends (who know nothing about my 7 1/2 year predicament) for lunch, yoga and golf this week.

Any comments would be appreciated!

Bodhi

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-02-2000
In reply to: bodhi2010
Thu, 06-24-2010 - 3:22pm

Trust me, you will definitely flourish! Not at first, most likely. You'll be sad, hurt, angry, regretful at the amount of time you spent waiting for someone else, etc. But eventually, you will start to feel better about yourself and be grateful that you're not involved in it anymore.

I hope that you will be prepared for his attempts to keep you where he wants you. The promises he'll make, etc. I can say with almost 100% conviction that anything he promises you, you can pretty much guarantee that he won't follow through. Stick to your guns. Just end it. If by some absolute miracle he comes back to you down the road, all divorced, then great. But I think you probably know that he never will. He either isn't as "miserable" as he claims, or he doesn't have the balls to get out of the marriage. Either way, you're the one that loses in the end.

Pages