You do nothing as far as he is concerned. Nothing. Why do u even feel you need to? Time to look at you. Focus on you. Go and/or stay LC or NC. Remove yourself from this everyway imaginable. Sorry u are going thru this. Maybe see a doctor unless u were always well protected.
Im trying...I told him to never try to contact me in anyway shape or form again and I'm seeing a doc. - I may have an autoimmune disease & I told him I needed the absolute truth from him about it b/c me not knowing could cost me my life if I were to get an infection....OMG!
I know you’ve been back and forth with NC for about 10 mos. and also with trying to be his friend. So as of last week you are now NC again?
In reading the post, you did not say specifically what you are terrified about? What do you mean the lengths he might go to keep it all from spilling out? Why are you getting involved in your brother-in-laws situation or xAP’s situation. It is their drama not yours.
You said you called xAP out on his lies. Did you threaten him or say you had some proof about him seeing the tweaker or about him being the father of the kid or some other information you had on him?
Ok so hubby and I know officers that work in all types of city/county/state/federal offices. They are not God and they don’t do the crap you see in movies. If you work around them in a govt. job, then you know this too! The up side of all this may be that xAP might jump at the opportunity to continue NC with you. He might what to distance himself from you. It could work out to benefit ending contact once and for all. You both
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Block him any way u can to reach you. Change personal email or phone if necessary. Sorry about ur illness. Make sure you take care of your health. Listen to your body. Why would he destroy ur credibility? Why would he feel threatened by him? U have left that part out. Ok, I get the fact you know stuf about him...but u having an A with him is enough.
Take deep breaths. Try to calm urself. I know u r in schoxk right now. I had an exap who was not at all what I thought either. I also had serious health issues after the fact. Thankfully I am fine now.
No point n getting so upset n adding to ur stress that u have no control over. U just have to deal with things when and IF they come up. Seriously. Think about it. Now all u can do is take care of you, come here n post n vent n work thru all ur pain n issues. You have to try not to focus on him, who he really is, or what may or may not happen
u should not be too surprised...he was having an A with you. MM often misrepresent themselves..
There are always prices to pay when we take risks of being in a A. Always the possibility if a dday. Hang in there n get to see your doc asap.
I read Luvin’s replies and your reply to her where you answered some of the questions I was also asking. Sorry I was posting my reply when those came in but looks like Luvin and I have the same take on it.
I am sorry to hear about your health problem and I pray that all tests come back clean. It does beg the question of why you would risk your health by having an A. By having a PA you were putting your health at risk. All of us in PAs do. Even those of us that had protected sex are taking a risk because protection is not 100%. However, you were aware of how dangerous this could be for you given the added health risk. I hope you are in IC figuring out what was going on inside you that would allow you to justify taking such a big risk with your health by having an A.
<>
<<All I know is I don't want to hear from anyone else about it unless / or until I get supoenad (sp?)>>
Why would you be going to court? This is the part of your post I’m trying to understand and wrap my head around. Your A has nothing to do with xAP’s and brother-in-law’s mess….does it? Am I missing something?
Also hear-say is not admissible. Again I ask. What direct personal PROOF do you or BIL have that xAP is/was seeing the tweaker? Based on the information in your post, the ONE PERSON I can see testify if xAP was seeing the tweaker is Miss Speed Freak herself! The lawyer could bring it to the judge’s attention.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
I, too, have NO idea just what about this situation has you so afraid to the lengths that you have posted. Maybe I read it wrong, but it seems to me you're talking about a paternity case, right? In which case, how does that have anything to do with you? Seems to me nothing. And that is a far cry from something criminal that you could possibly be supoenaed for. Personally, I think you're making a huge mountain out of a molehill. Does this guy sound like a real scumbag? Yep, it sure does.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
All hearsay and none fall under any known hearsay exception that I can think of off hand. There are these rules of evidence that everyone has to follow-that all apply all hearings. They do not apply to grand jury proceedings but your situation will likely never have such a thing based on what you have stated. Like E-1, I do not see the link. And you have nothing to say to anyone unless you are summoned to do so. You should lay all your fears to rest for now, focus on you and stay NC/LC. There is thread that tells you the rules of LC. From what I know it is very difficult but very doable. I suggest you stop obsessing over all this drama, shift gears here. Stay here. Take care of your health.
Pages
You do nothing as far as he is concerned. Nothing. Why do u even feel you need to? Time to look at you. Focus on you. Go and/or stay LC or NC. Remove yourself from this everyway imaginable. Sorry u are going thru this. Maybe see a doctor unless u were always well protected.
Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
Hi Rena,
I know you’ve been back and forth with NC for about 10 mos. and also with trying to be his friend. So as of last week you are now NC again?
In reading the post, you did not say specifically what you are terrified about? What do you mean the lengths he might go to keep it all from spilling out? Why are you getting involved in your brother-in-laws situation or xAP’s situation. It is their drama not yours.
You said you called xAP out on his lies. Did you threaten him or say you had some proof about him seeing the tweaker or about him being the father of the kid or some other information you had on him?
Ok so hubby and I know officers that work in all types of city/county/state/federal offices. They are not God and they don’t do the crap you see in movies. If you work around them in a govt. job, then you know this too! The up side of all this may be that xAP might jump at the opportunity to continue NC with you. He might what to distance himself from you. It could work out to benefit ending contact once and for all. You both
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Block him any way u can to reach you. Change personal email or phone if necessary. Sorry about ur illness. Make sure you take care of your health. Listen to your body. Why would he destroy ur credibility? Why would he feel threatened by him? U have left that part out. Ok, I get the fact you know stuf about him...but u having an A with him is enough.
Take deep breaths. Try to calm urself. I know u r in schoxk right now. I had an exap who was not at all what I thought either. I also had serious health issues after the fact. Thankfully I am fine now.
No point n getting so upset n adding to ur stress that u have no control over. U just have to deal with things when and IF they come up. Seriously. Think about it. Now all u can do is take care of you, come here n post n vent n work thru all ur pain n issues. You have to try not to focus on him, who he really is, or what may or may not happen
u should not be too surprised...he was having an A with you. MM often misrepresent themselves..
There are always prices to pay when we take risks of being in a A. Always the possibility if a dday. Hang in there n get to see your doc asap.
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
I read Luvin’s replies and your reply to her where you answered some of the questions I was also asking. Sorry I was posting my reply when those came in but looks like Luvin and I have the same take on it.
I am sorry to hear about your health problem and I pray that all tests come back clean. It does beg the question of why you would risk your health by having an A. By having a PA you were putting your health at risk. All of us in PAs do. Even those of us that had protected sex are taking a risk because protection is not 100%. However, you were aware of how dangerous this could be for you given the added health risk. I hope you are in IC figuring out what was going on inside you that would allow you to justify taking such a big risk with your health by having an A.
<>
<<All I know is I don't want to hear from anyone else about it unless / or until I get supoenad (sp?)>>
Why would you be going to court? This is the part of your post I’m trying to understand and wrap my head around. Your A has nothing to do with xAP’s and brother-in-law’s mess….does it? Am I missing something?
Also hear-say is not admissible. Again I ask. What direct personal PROOF do you or BIL have that xAP is/was seeing the tweaker? Based on the information in your post, the ONE PERSON I can see testify if xAP was seeing the tweaker is Miss Speed Freak herself! The lawyer could bring it to the judge’s attention.
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
Hi!
Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.
All hearsay and none fall under any known hearsay exception that I can think of off hand. There are these rules of evidence that everyone has to follow-that all apply all hearings. They do not apply to grand jury proceedings but your situation will likely never have such a thing based on what you have stated. Like E-1, I do not see the link. And you have nothing to say to anyone unless you are summoned to do so. You should lay all your fears to rest for now, focus on you and stay NC/LC. There is thread that tells you the rules of LC. From what I know it is very difficult but very doable. I suggest you stop obsessing over all this drama, shift gears here. Stay here. Take care of your health.
Luvin
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
Pages