Help! A married man in love.......

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2010
Help! A married man in love.......
13
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 7:42am

Hi,


I have reached that stage where not only I accept the affair has no real future ( i sort of knew that all along) but where the pain and anxiety outweighs the fantasy and the addictive things.


I need help to end it. I have told some close friends in order to drag it out into the open.


I mentioned the pain i have been having to the AP and she says she is able to compartmentalise and i can, i just need to get stronger. She also said that if i loved her i would be mad to end it given the problems in my marriage.


I have suspected this woman to be highly manipulative in the past; she books the hotel rooms and gets annoyed if i get cold feet about anything. She takes more risks. I have been the one to try to end it in the past. Of course i have engaged in my own games!


I need to see her as a needy woman who does not need me but a better marriage and sense of self esteem.


I am in love with her - i need to see her as human. Please help!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-21-2010
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 12:33pm

Thank you. I cant believe the generosity of people on here.


I will make a note of what you say about the healing library and the useful posts.


When i tried NC on a previosu ocassion my AP said she accepted it but that she was so upset it was causing her H undue concern and suspicion. It frightened me into contact again. Is this common?


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 1:17pm

RP,


<<

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
Sat, 08-21-2010 - 4:11pm

I knew by the time I returned someone would have answered your question :)


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