he's hvng affair wif me.shud i end it?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2004
he's hvng affair wif me.shud i end it?
1
Thu, 06-17-2004 - 1:23am
hi there,

Im seeing this guy for almost 3 mths now. Problem is, he has a gf for almost 3 yrs. His gf is a flight attendant, so u can imagine the amount of time we are free to spend with each other. But even when she's around, he still looks for me. Although i can see he is trying very hard not to let me know she's in town (cos he knows i feel bad abt this), i know; and i feel extreme guilt. We talked abt this once. He said he does feel guilty towards her but he says his feelings for me is uncontrollable. So to me, as long as he continues to love her n i dont get in the way cos i dun expect him to leave her for me. We enjoy each other's company alot (maybe cos we're in the honeymoon period). I encourage him to spend time with her when she's in town and enjoy the moment when we are alone together. but then at times, i feel i shud end this. I'm torn between "why worry about tomorrow;let tomorrow worry for itself" and doing what is morally right.

pls help! appreciate your candid comments & advise.

thanks...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Thu, 06-17-2004 - 9:09am
I have a hard time understanding this kind of a situation. Why *don't* you expect him to leave her for you? They aren't married. Is there something else tying them together? Kids? If not, why are you willing to play second fiddle to someone he is not morally or legally obligated to stay with?

Those are just my gut reactions -- things I would think about if I were you. Hugs to you, I think we ALL deserve more than that.