iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Wed, 02-12-2014 - 1:06am

Hello All,

I came on today because I had forgotten a moniker and curiosity got the best of me. I usually have a good memory but could not recall the moniker for days.  I logged in and began my search.  Once on, I couldn’t help but read some new threads and was tempted to jump in and give support. Then I thought, I haven’t been on for a long time and regular posters might wonder who is this and what makes her think she can jump in with advice?

They would be right. I mean who am I? I’m just a poster like them… just fast forwarded a few years like six or seven…meaning six to seven years—I’ve lost count—out from D-day.  

I could proffer up a whole pep talk. Tell you all about my A, D-day, and rebuilding my M. It might make for interesting reading but I worry it might come across as if I’m so far away at the other end of the tunnel and not focused on trudging through the muck. I fear it would NOT come across as the pep talk that I would want it to be. The “you can do it,” message that I would hope to communicate might be lost in the I’m so far out of the A rendition.

I think it is easier to say. I AM YOU. I AM ALL OF YOU six or seven years ago. I remember the gamut of feelings. How efen hard it was to get through even one day of NC. I remember wanting to let go and at the same time how painful it was.

I hope you won’t be offended that I have no, “way, truth and light” doctrine to share. Just support and the idea that we can all help one another get through the muck.

Much love and big hugs,


Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-2009
In reply to: empowerment1
Sat, 02-22-2014 - 9:42pm


I haven't been on here for years. For some odd reason I decided to just check things out on EAS again, I log on and the 1st post I see is yours. You Will never know the smile that it put on my face. 

5 years ago I was in the depths of my A and it was the wonderful and inspirational women of EAS that helped me through the pain. The more I read on here the more the fog began to lift. The more that I saw how I had pushed my H away so I could give myself an "excuse" for my behavior. EAS helped me see how I was physically with my family at night but my mind and heart were both a million miles away. I began to see how the A was NOT reality, it was not a healthy relationship and it was born out of 2 very broken people. 

It wasn't easy getting my life back but I did. It wasn't easy repairing my marriage but I did. And it wasn't easy sticking with NC but I did....and it worked. 

There is hope for those of you that are ending an A. Please take the advice that the veterans on here give. Without them I'm not sure that I would have been able to be as strong. 

Bless each and every one of you. 


Avatar for wClarity
Community Leader
Registered: 11-04-2012
In reply to: wClarity
Sun, 02-23-2014 - 9:58am


I guess there must be something in the stars with several older posters being drawn here to share their experience to help spur others forward.

It's really nice of you to drop by and share your success story.  I'm happy to hear you doing well and that you got your marriage back on track.

Thank you for dropping by :)



Community Leader,

Ending an Affair Support Board