How do you move on?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2010
How do you move on?
5
Mon, 01-25-2010 - 6:26pm

The affair was short, just three months, and the physical side of things was very limited (no S, but defninely other things).

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2009
Mon, 01-25-2010 - 6:44pm
aj,
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Mon, 01-25-2010 - 6:55pm

Honey, you move on by taking it one day at a time and not looking any further than that right now. As you go through your day, try to come here as much as you can and read, read, read. Have you been to the Healing Library yet? There is a thread there for maintaining limited contact called, "How to maintain LC at the workplace," and although it was constructed for AP's that work together, there are some excellent suggestions on how to set boundaries and "fake it till you make it," for those of you who are neighbors, family friends, etc.


Try not to worry about the "friend" thing right now because he will probably not want that happening anyway, especially if his W knows about the affair. She will be watching him like a hawk, and this will work in your favor, even though right now it hurts like the dickens.


<>

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2010
Mon, 01-25-2010 - 6:58pm
Hang in there...take a deep breath...cry if you must and get it out. Although a new poster, I have been reading for many years and after finally "hearing"(thanks Iddy, Clarity, etal) just finally got the courage to end things in December '09...no "ending" talk, just blocked # and went NC. Opened my eyes and saw how lucky I am to have the family I have. Keep busy (I run/exercise), focus on H/kids and your work(I signed up for extra committees at work). Whatever keeps your mind elsewhere. Believe in yourself and love yourself -you can get past this. I have broken NC so many times and tried to be friends, but guess what we were never friends or we would never have reached that place; so "learn" from the slowest learner here. With time and distance and hard work it does get better.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-11-2009
Mon, 01-25-2010 - 8:35pm

Hey, ajayceegirl~


Well, I'm the President of the

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2008
Mon, 01-25-2010 - 9:00pm

Hi Ajay,


Welcome to EAS.


It is hard to be on the receiving end of NC.


You wrote: << I'm just not happy with HOW it ended... by just ignoring me like this, no mutual agreement, nothing, as if I was supposed to just be okay with it.>>

Whether you think you can or you think you can't you are probably right. A parrot can repeat what it has learned but the mark of true intelligence is applying what is learned.