How to End a Affair

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-06-2004
How to End a Affair
3
Mon, 12-06-2004 - 4:22pm

Hi all,

I am Married and have been involved w/a MM for a little over a year and have recently decieded to end the A.

The problem is I just don't know how to end it. I have tried not calling, not returning phone calls, making excuses etc. However, nothing seems to work, he keeps calling & pursuing.

I spoke w/him this a.m. & told him I could not see him tonight, maybe later in the week. I am not trying to be cruel, but I am afraid he will be angry & try to hurt me & my family. For example, I gave him a gift several weeks ago & he told me this morning that he either lost it or burned it when he was angry. Although, he did say, "I may have to start all over again" with another women if I don't start seeing him again.

Actually, I have been thinking of smothering him with attention & making demands on him. Maybe this will work because ignoring him is not doing the trick.

Anyone else a similar situation?

BM

Avatar for shescomeundone2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 12-06-2004 - 4:31pm
You tell him in no uncertain terms that the relationship is over. If he continues to call you then you go down to the police department and file a Order of harassment or an Order of Protection.

Jazzdiva

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-01-2004
Tue, 12-07-2004 - 2:08pm

That's one of the things about these situations. At least for me where I didn't want what I had gotten myself into spewed publicly. So trying to quit without setting him off was a big issue.


I am still having problems with this actually.


If you really are afraid of physical harm though, I agree with Undone.


Someday

Avatar for shescomeundone2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Tue, 12-07-2004 - 2:12pm
i know that it seems really drastic, but this man doesn't sound normal not letting something be over when she said in no uncertain terms that it is over. She is thinking about making up some kind of story to see if he'll go away. That just seems so uncalled for.

Jazzdiva