How many times did you end the emr or initiate no contact before finally calling it quits?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005
How many times did you end the emr or initiate no contact before finally calling it quits?
8
Tue, 01-04-2011 - 12:44am

I just wrote a response to someone on MASboard and as i typed the last line, an idea came to me to ask this question on this board. I am an ex-ow for years now. in fact my former emr ended 18 years ago.

k2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2009
I ran on a poll on this last year and the most common number was three times. One of the options was "too many times to count" and that was popular too. If you read some of the threads in this forum you will also see that many of us just kept trying until it finally stuck.

((Hugs))
Be where you are; otherwise you will miss your life. ~ Buddha
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010

I ended for good on the third attempt. Almost three months ago.

The first two times were only half-hearted attempts by me, to end because I knew it was wrong and feeling guilty about it. But I could never go more than three weeks without contacting him and allowing myself to get sucked back into the mire of neediness for the ego stroking he provided.

This third time around, we actually had set a rendezvous date (we were LD) and a couple weeks before that date I just had this epiphany and knew he wasn't going to make me feel better. I knew I'd feel worse after our weekend together. That's when I just knew I was done. I sent him an email telling him I couldn't make the date--because I wanted to see what his reaction would be--but I

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-21-2009

Ended the PA several times through out the 7+ year A, only to eventually go back to it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-31-2009

Third time was the charm for me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005

ok. so three seems to be the popular number. ok.

k2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-27-2005

i want to tell you something. you give me an idea for a new post. i am going to ask it now. This site is enjoyable to be on though, you learn so much.

k2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-13-2010

Iddy, I just had to tell you that your tag line is so right on and keeps me focused.

Nothing has ever been more true than your line.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2010

It took me more times than I can even count.... I'm a slow learner :)