How much should be told?
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How much should be told?
| Fri, 06-25-2004 - 9:03am |
It has been a while since I have posted here mainly because I have been feeling alot better about xMM. I am on 4 months of NC and it has been almost 6 months since I have seen him. I never thought that this day would come but I can not tell you how much better I have been feeling recently. I think that a part of xMM will always be with me but the thoughts are no longer consuming me like they used to. This board has helped so much - mainly it has been a big comfort knowing that there are others who have the same feelings as me.
Here is my question. I am single and recently met a (SINGLE!!) guy. Things are progressing along nicely. I do not think that the subject will be coming up anytime soon but what should be said about xMM when past relationships does come up? The A lasted about a year. No one in my family knows about xMM other than a few friends. I could easily get away without having to talk about it. Should I do just that? It is just that I feel that the A changed me so much. I have different views about alot of things now and maybe they should be explained?
Advice would be appreciated!

Firstly, Congratulations on the new SINGLE Guy relationship! In my opinion, I wouldn't even mention XMM. That relationship didn't take place within your new relationship with SM, so why cause a possible problem if not necessary. My advice would be to keep that part of your life "hush-hush" from your new guy.
I also want to Congratulate you on your "recovery" of XMM. You made it...Good For You!
All The Best,
Katy
If he doesn't bring the topic of your past relationships up, then don't bother. But what happens if, as the two of you are deepening your relationship and sharing about yourselves he asks you how long its been since your last relationship. Are you going to lie to him? I'm going to go out on a limb and say that the few friends who know about your past are close friends. When you and your new boyfriend are socializing and the topic comes up, are they also going to lie to him? Are all of you going to continually lie to him? because that's what you are going to have to do if you don't want to tell.
Not for nothing, but to me what kind of emotionally intimate relationship could you possibly have with him if you are continually going to be on your guard to make sure you NEVER make a reference to