Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart... Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens. I started looking inside and went NC October 15, 2010
Good you did not break it. And if anything, he may have not felt bad, he may have gotten a much needed ego stroke, I do not know your exAP or your story but I do know that they do all kinds of things to fish.
Thank you so much Iddy. Unfortunately I cannot access this site from work so I cannot reach out to you guys during the day. I have found that to be very difficult since a lot of my triggers happen at work.... thank goodness I have at least one person I can text if I get desperate. And I actually did not write the email with the intention of sending it... I wanted to try and get the feelings out... but then there it was, (unaddressed) but would have been so easy to send... so I waivered back and forth for a while. But I did not want to expose myself to those harsh elements again... and I knew the anxiety I would have brought on myself had I sent it... right back to where I used to be.... waiting to see if he would write me back. ugh! not going there again.
About 3 days into NC, my xAP (he'd just recently reunited with his GF) sent out a company-wide email about software updates and his tone was SO cheerful (he's not a cheeful guy) that I was just floored!!!!!!
DAMMIT! ARE YOU SERIOUS?/??!!!
Good you did not break it. And if anything, he may have not felt bad, he may have gotten a much needed ego stroke, I do not know your exAP or your story but I do know that they do all kinds of things to fish.
Yo Soy EL Capitan de Mi Vida
Good Job girl!
My dear, Aliveagain....
Whew! That was too close for even my comfort.
Oh, honey, do I understand!!!
About 3 days into NC, my xAP (he'd just recently reunited with his GF) sent out a company-wide email about software updates and his tone was SO cheerful (he's not a cheeful guy) that I was just floored!!!!!!
Im glad you resisted the urge and maintained your NC. 5 weeks NC is amazing. You are through the worst of it.!! You go girl!!
MC