i am afraid i can't do it

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-27-2004
i am afraid i can't do it
3
Mon, 11-29-2004 - 11:33am

maybe the desire for MM is too strong. i just can't do it. )-:

but i know that proceeding down this path can only lead to heartbreak for me. i know he would never leave his W and two little tots, including a baby.

i am so torn. i don't want to lose a friend but now MM is no longer just a friend. i can't let go.

somehow my heart got involved.... and i was not expecting that to happen

do you think if i told him how i feel that he will be the one to break it off and then i will be free of all this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2004
Mon, 11-29-2004 - 12:04pm

luv,

I had to be the one to "do-it". To break it off. Lord knows I didn't want to but I was faced w/ so many factors that influenced me to go ahead. Now I am struggling w/ the whole NC thing.

It's very hard to do, especially when you love your OM/MM. I realized that I love myself, my H and my M too much to continue the A. The A was destroying me mentally, making me a weak dependent woman, which I am not....so the decision was to end the A.

I truly wish you the best in whatever you decide!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-27-2004
Mon, 11-29-2004 - 2:03pm

I am normally such a strong person but I just don't have the strength to break it off. WHY AM I SO WEAK WHEN IT COMES TO MM?

I think it is hopeless. :-(

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-18-2004
Mon, 11-29-2004 - 2:22pm

I understand. I am weak too when it comes to OM. He wants to see me today. Says he needs "closure" to our break up & that he is ready to accept it and move on. Of course I'm going to go...but I can't allow myself to get sucked back in.

I wonder why these OM/MM have such control over our will power? At first I thought it was just the earth shaking sex but now, in the end, I realize it's mental. They tap into us deeper than we could ever possibly imagine.

I don't think you're hopeless...I just think you are normal...like most of us who post here.