Hi Sunrise, welcome and congratulations on "having the integrity to stop the madness". Yes, what you are feeling is absolutely normal. In week one I was consumed with thoughts of him; I was devastated that he could let me go so easily (even though I was the one who ended it and he never once wavered in his certainty that what were doing "felt right and therefore must be right"); I was sure it wouldn't be long before he found someone else to make him feel good; and I certainly didn't trust my feelings.
But guess what?? After the awful pain of those first few weeks it gets better! I'm only day 22 of NC today, and already I can go several hours without thinking about him and when I do I'm kind of pissed off that he's made his way back into my head space; rather than seeing his silence as an affront I'm grateful that he has respected my request for NC; I really couldn't care less who he chooses to have an A with next (although a secret, mean part of me kind of hopes it ends badly!); and I am feeling stronger and more confident than I have in years.
It's great to hear that you're in MC. My H also knows that I was in an A, and we are working hard to rebuild our marriage. For
I'm so pleased you finally made this decision. You will see in my post that while I have been out of the madness for some time and total NC for nearly 3 mths - I had a crashing few days. He contacted me, I didn't respond but I spent several days obsessed with " how could he's" and ended up snooping on him in a dating site. I acted pathetically and I'm heartily ashamed.
But through that setback I can see that although out, I am still caught up in the addiction, drama and escapism of the A. I have put in tough yards but not the right yards. I see that I need thehelp of an IC and my official recount of NC starts today.
Something you said really got me too. I had this realization on Valentines Day!!! How appropriate. This whole stinking mess was driven by my need for self-love. I get it now. Truly get it!!!!
I feel better today then I have in ages. Im with you Sunrise!!!'
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Thank you all for your support and encouragement.
Hello Sunrise,
So very happy to see you here!!!
Hi Sunrise, welcome and congratulations on "having the integrity to stop the madness". Yes, what you are feeling is absolutely normal. In week one I was consumed with thoughts of him; I was devastated that he could let me go so easily (even though I was the one who ended it and he never once wavered in his certainty that what were doing "felt right and therefore must be right"); I was sure it wouldn't be long before he found someone else to make him feel good; and I certainly didn't trust my feelings.
But guess what?? After the awful pain of those first few weeks it gets better! I'm only day 22 of NC today, and already I can go several hours without thinking about him and when I do I'm kind of pissed off that he's made his way back into my head space; rather than seeing his silence as an affront I'm grateful that he has respected my request for NC; I really couldn't care less who he chooses to have an A with next (although a secret, mean part of me kind of hopes it ends badly!); and I am feeling stronger and more confident than I have in years.
It's great to hear that you're in MC. My H also knows that I was in an A, and we are working hard to rebuild our marriage. For
The wonderful, generous, compassionate
I'm so pleased you finally made this decision. You will see in my post that while I have been out of the madness for some time and total NC for nearly 3 mths - I had a crashing few days. He contacted me, I didn't respond but I spent several days obsessed with " how could he's" and ended up snooping on him in a dating site. I acted pathetically and I'm heartily ashamed.
But through that setback I can see that although out, I am still caught up in the addiction, drama and escapism of the A. I have put in tough yards but not the right yards. I see that I need thehelp of an IC and my official recount of NC starts today.
Something you said really got me too. I had this realization on Valentines Day!!! How appropriate. This whole stinking mess was driven by my need for self-love. I get it now. Truly get it!!!!
I feel better today then I have in ages. Im with you Sunrise!!!'
Iggyxx
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