I am pathetic- Day 6 - I failed NC

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2010
I am pathetic- Day 6 - I failed NC
21
Mon, 09-13-2010 - 4:55am

Ok I am opening myself up here. I cant believe I freaking broke bloody NC! God Im so mad at myself and so worried I am not as strong as all of you. FCK! (Sorry). I texted him at 4 this afternoon (nearly made the whole day) and said 'This is so hard'. Of course he didnt respond.



I have tortured myself this evening about why did I do this? Why did I fish? How could

You are what you consistently do

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Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
Mon, 09-20-2010 - 9:20am

Ratherbeme,

<>

OMG. So incredibly well said. I didn't leave anything of extreme value, but I do have a leather motorcycle jacket that I bought when I was with him (was a very stupid purchase since I don't even have a motorcycle...he has 2 and of course, "thrilled" me with the rides). I could get some money for that. I will leave the key with no note. I think that the notes/thoughts I write down are good for ME - many of you journal and I think it helps with clarity in this whole "falling off of the high" thing. Iggy, do you journal? I have a "my diary" app on my phone that is locked with a password, so I know my DH could never read it.
Again, thank you, RBM, for your response.

Hearts <3
NC since 9/18...free to be ME!!

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