I am totally stripped

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-02-2003
I am totally stripped
2
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 3:48pm
I am totally stripped. There is nothing left of me. Now that my husband knows about my past EMA, my family knows also. They have all disowned me, not because of the affair, but because I am white and my EX-OM is black. My family is very prejudiced. My mom doesn't want any more to do with me. My grown kids are through with me. My family has sided with my soon to be ex-husband. I have no family left. All I have is myself. My ex-om doesn't even know what to say to me. He thinks its better for him not to get involved in this, especially since we work for the same place. Right now is when I really need him as a friend, but he thinks he should stay away from me since the rumors are about him. I don't know what to do. This would all have been okay if my EMA had been with a white man, but since he was black, I have lost everything.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 4:21pm
I am so sorry to hear you are going thru this, SouthernGirl!

This really sucks. Please know that you are not alone. We are here for you. Sadly, you can not change the ignorant beliefs of others. Hopefully they will come around one day, but it's time to work on yourself for now. I really recommend getting some therapy- it isn't a quick fix, but it sounds like you are going to need some help. It will take time. I will be praying for you. Sounds like OM is a little freaked about the situation. You really should probably steer clear of him for many reasons. Especially if you want to work on your marriage. Please keep us posted and try to stay strong. I grew up in a small southern town, so I know that sometimes the people can be cruel and stuck in the past. You are better than that, and you are doing the right thing.

I'm here if you need me,

Lily

Love, Lily PG with #1 EDD 11/23 baby
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Mon, 09-13-2004 - 8:46pm
Ditto to everything lily said, and hugs {{{southerngirl}}}. I am so sorry that you feel so alone right now. Please, hang in there, take things one day at a time, and be good to yourself. I am sure that as dire as things seem right now, they will get better with time, they have to.