JJ, Welcome to the board for real. You already know the "welcome drill", as you've been here unofficially long enough to have read it as least a few times, so I'll skip the official spiel and get straight to some direction. I hear/get what you're saying about being so tired that you don't want to think, but I urge you to find that little extra bit of strength to think and think hard about getting that 'plan' you say you don't have. New enders really _need_ to have a plan, a battle plan, if you will, because relying on the new-ender's instincts and normal modes of coping without one is a risk you cannot afford. You need to quickly amass your weapons and build your defenses. I like to suggest the New Enders make a list of what they will do and what they won't do (under any circumstances), and stick to that list no matter what the situation and no matter what the emotion-of-the-moment overcomes them. Doing this helps us from continuing to be our own worst enemy.
Monday is going to bring a lot of challenges for you, so you have today to brace up. Reading the Healing Library is like going to War College! I wish you the best of luck.
I'd like to officially welcome you to Endings. You have done all the right things here for blocking and walking, and as you have already said, he needs no explanation. He's well aware of, or will be, what's going on here. I remember asking my XMM several times in the last year (we work together) if he wanted to end this , and he would always answer, "Yes and No." Why? Because he didn't want to be the bad guy. So, when I had enough I took it upon myself to fill the role. Someone had to do it or it would just continue in maintenance mode until we either got busted, ended up hating one another, or the worse case scenario would
I am super happy to welcome another Jane here. Welcome to endings. I too cried wolf millions of times. And the last ending (on Jan 28) was just like all of the rest, except that I meant it. I mean I really meant it. So, do you really mean it? Do you really want to get your life back? Do you really want to wade through the pain ahead to live in brighter days ahead? That will be the difference between this ending and all of the rest. For my xap, he didn't see the difference. He told a mutual friend after our last ending, that "she will be back." Guess what? Hell no! That was over 7 months ago and I know with all of my heart that I will never, ever, ever go back. I've given myself a chance to sort through a lot of emotions, and while I am not out of the woods in terms of it being completely absent from my thoughts, this ending is forever. I am glad you here. I hope you are here for a long time to come.
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JJ,
Welcome to the board for real. You already know the "welcome drill", as you've been here unofficially long enough to have read it as least a few times, so I'll skip the official spiel and get straight to some direction. I hear/get what you're saying about being so tired that you don't want to think, but I urge you to find that little extra bit of strength to think and think hard about getting that 'plan' you say you don't have. New enders really _need_ to have a plan, a battle plan, if you will, because relying on the new-ender's instincts and normal modes of coping without one is a risk you cannot afford. You need to quickly amass your weapons and build your defenses. I like to suggest the New Enders make a list of what they will do and what they won't do (under any circumstances), and stick to that list no matter what the situation and no matter what the emotion-of-the-moment overcomes them. Doing this helps us from continuing to be our own worst enemy.
Monday is going to bring a lot of challenges for you, so you have today to brace up. Reading the Healing Library is like going to War College! I wish you the best of luck.
Dee
JJ,
I'd like to officially welcome you to Endings. You have done all the right things here for blocking and walking, and as you have already said, he needs no explanation. He's well aware of, or will be, what's going on here. I remember asking my XMM several times in the last year (we work together) if he wanted to end this , and he would always answer, "Yes and No." Why? Because he didn't want to be the bad guy. So, when I had enough I took it upon myself to fill the role. Someone had to do it or it would just continue in maintenance mode until we either got busted, ended up hating one another, or the worse case scenario would
~Iddy~
((hugs))
And a warm welcome to EAS. As
"I can be changed by what happens to me. But I refuse to be reduced by it."
— Maya Angelou
I am super happy to welcome another Jane here. Welcome to endings. I too cried wolf millions of times. And the last ending (on Jan 28) was just like all of the rest, except that I meant it. I mean I really meant it. So, do you really mean it? Do you really want to get your life back? Do you really want to wade through the pain ahead to live in brighter days ahead? That will be the difference between this ending and all of the rest. For my xap, he didn't see the difference. He told a mutual friend after our last ending, that "she will be back." Guess what? Hell no! That was over 7 months ago and I know with all of my heart that I will never, ever, ever go back. I've given myself a chance to sort through a lot of emotions, and while I am not out of the woods in terms of it being completely absent from my thoughts, this ending is forever. I am glad you here. I hope you are here for a long time to come.
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
Hey Janie
Thanks for using
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