I Gave Myself Closure.....

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-20-2003
I Gave Myself Closure.....
2
Wed, 04-21-2004 - 8:55pm
Hi, Everyone


I know I shouldn't have done this but I'm glad I did. I emailed my MM and said my final goodbye although I said good-bye Monday. I had unfinished business within myself and NEEDED to tell him how I felt. I feel somewhat at peace in telling him how much the relationship meant to me and that I leave without bitterness, anger, or regret and I only wish him happiness, regardless of what that entails. I told him what I have learned and thanked him for his part as well as telling him that I am okay and will be okay. I told him that I leave him with only love in my heart and that I will always love him and that I wish him a good life.

I still feel the pain, but it's a healthy pain ( I might feel different and go through the emotional mess like Monday, but that's okay)that I know is what my counselor calls an FGO which means a F!@kin' Growth Opportunity. I am taking this all the way and I refuse to cave and I will grow from this. Thank you everyone for letting me vent.

MidnightBlue

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Wed, 04-21-2004 - 10:18pm
Hey, good for you. I am all for the closure note/meeting/phone call/whatever. That's how my A ended, and I am so grateful for that.

The last thing I sent to him before we embarked on the crazy NC journey was the lyrics to Blessid Union of Souls "Peace and Love." Wanna hear it? Tough, you're going to anyway, just a short bit of them: ;-)

May every star you wish upon

And every hope you're hanging on come true

Out of everybody in the world

There's no one who deserves it more than you

I hope you find

Everything you've been dreaming of

Only good things

No in-betweens, just

Peace and love

These words did not come easily

Still you know I had to write them down

You must know what you mean to me

I wish that you could always be around

I hope you find

Everything you are worthy of

I'm gonna miss you

But I only wish you

Peace and love

Peace and love

Tears of joy

Kindness of strangers

All of your roads

Paved in gold

By guardian angels

Wherever you may be in this world

My salutation says it all

May you always have enough

Peace and love

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 04-22-2004 - 2:24pm

MNB, there is nothing wrong with writing that closure email or even with sending it. Writing it gives you the opportunity to purge the feelings from within. Sending it gives you the release of knowing that he knows just how you stand on the issues.


Just keep in mind that he may use this as an excuse for further communication. "What do you mean by . . .?" Why . . .?" Do not let him draw you back in!


Yo can now move forward with your life. Hooray!