I had a weird thing happen today
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I had a weird thing happen today
| Thu, 09-09-2004 - 9:58pm |
The weirdest thing happened today. I'm sure a lot of you, especially those of you who have been involved in an A with a MM that's in your close circle of friends, can relate to this.
My MM and I were good good friends before the A, and the A was quickly put on ice when his W became jealous of the friendship. Really. The sex is over. But the depth of the intimacy and the strong emotional connection was so intense, that pretty much not a second goes by that I don't think about him and what we experienced. The sex was fantastic, but the relationship was very emotionally intimate. We were definitely 2 peas in a pod. He seemed resigned to staying in his marriage though...mainly because, as he said, "I made my bed, now I have to lie in it." And he certainly didn't sound very happy about lying in that bed.
Anyway - with that said....a common friend of ours today told me that he went to dinner with the OM last night. He does NOT know about us. He began to tell me how OM opened up to him like he never had before, in a discussion about finding the "right one," and how he knew right away that his wife was "absolutely the one" as soon as he met her, and how he knew there would never be another one ever again, that she was the ONE, and that he played around a lot before meeting his W, but from that moment on, he never ever wanted another woman again, that this was it. The woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
My God. I just had absolutely no idea what to say to that....even though I was hearing from a friend who was just thinking that my OM was the sweetest, most dedicated husband in the world, and how he hoped he could someday have that kind of love, that kind of relationship with a woman too.
I wanted to burst out laughing, while at the same time my heart just dropped to my stomach. I actually felt physically ill to hear this.
Unfortunately for me, even though as far as I'm concerned, our physical relationship is over, we still see each other every day at work, and while we seem to be great buddies when we're around other people, like we always were, I feel so awkward around him, that I don't know what to say when we're alone. Tonight he was in my office, alone with me, and I could NOT stop thinking about what my friend had told me, and I probably seemed rude because I was literally biting my tongue in order to not say something about what I'd been told. I just am having such a hard time handling this.
My MM and I were good good friends before the A, and the A was quickly put on ice when his W became jealous of the friendship. Really. The sex is over. But the depth of the intimacy and the strong emotional connection was so intense, that pretty much not a second goes by that I don't think about him and what we experienced. The sex was fantastic, but the relationship was very emotionally intimate. We were definitely 2 peas in a pod. He seemed resigned to staying in his marriage though...mainly because, as he said, "I made my bed, now I have to lie in it." And he certainly didn't sound very happy about lying in that bed.
Anyway - with that said....a common friend of ours today told me that he went to dinner with the OM last night. He does NOT know about us. He began to tell me how OM opened up to him like he never had before, in a discussion about finding the "right one," and how he knew right away that his wife was "absolutely the one" as soon as he met her, and how he knew there would never be another one ever again, that she was the ONE, and that he played around a lot before meeting his W, but from that moment on, he never ever wanted another woman again, that this was it. The woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
My God. I just had absolutely no idea what to say to that....even though I was hearing from a friend who was just thinking that my OM was the sweetest, most dedicated husband in the world, and how he hoped he could someday have that kind of love, that kind of relationship with a woman too.
I wanted to burst out laughing, while at the same time my heart just dropped to my stomach. I actually felt physically ill to hear this.
Unfortunately for me, even though as far as I'm concerned, our physical relationship is over, we still see each other every day at work, and while we seem to be great buddies when we're around other people, like we always were, I feel so awkward around him, that I don't know what to say when we're alone. Tonight he was in my office, alone with me, and I could NOT stop thinking about what my friend had told me, and I probably seemed rude because I was literally biting my tongue in order to not say something about what I'd been told. I just am having such a hard time handling this.

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Sorry for the misinterpretation. You're right.....we're both screwed...lol.
Good luck! I'll be thinking of you!
Edited 2/16/2005 1:34 pm ET ET by iris304
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