I KNOW YOU ARE ALL RIGHT BUT

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2005
I KNOW YOU ARE ALL RIGHT BUT
2
Mon, 01-17-2005 - 3:27pm
how do i just stop loving him? i have dated many men in my life and had a few very serious relationships. i even was engaged at one point. when i met my MM we were really just friendly at first but he was amazing to me. everything about him was exactly what i love. he is always sweet kind and loving with me but he is never really mine. i know how stupid i am to be in this situation but i love him. i love him more than i think i could ever love any other man and it scares me to think about it. when this is over will i ever know the kind of craving for a man that i have for my MM? i don't just mean sex. i mean everything. i am afraid that i will feel worse after he is gone than i feel now. is this normal?
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2005
Mon, 01-17-2005 - 6:46pm
Try to remember that the person that you want to spend your life with loves you as much as you love them. Anything less and they don't deserve you. I loved my XMM more than anyone I'd ever loved. When I realized that I couldn't love him enough to lose my own self respect it was over for me. If he is so worthy of your affections, would he allow you to hurt the way you do? Love isn't supposed to hurt you this way. Love is supposed to be uplifting and strengthening. The two of you together are supposed to be more than the sum of the parts. Affairs don't have that kind of love. Affairs have hurt, denial, weakness, sadness, betrayal, and lies to mention a few. MM that engage in affairs that don't end their marriages for their "true loves", don't really love the OW as much as they attest to. True love overrides all. At the very least if for some reason their challenges to ending their marriage cannot be overcome, any worthy married man/woman engaged in an affair with someone that they purport to love so much would let them go. I posted a reply to your question for me on my post. I hope it helps. Hugs.
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2003
Mon, 01-17-2005 - 6:54pm

Kelly

DITTO

Very well said and Very TRUE.

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