I miss him but ....

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-15-2010
I miss him but ....
5
Wed, 11-24-2010 - 7:08am

When I wake every morning..my thoughts go to ex AP BUT the good things are:

I dont wake with a knot in the pit of my stomach

My hands don't ache from being clenched all night

I look in the mirror and smile and like who I see

sooooo its not all bad.....Have a good day everyone!:smileyhappy:

MC

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
Wed, 11-24-2010 - 7:33am

Yay!!! Isn't that a great feeling, MC?? So happy and excited for you. I'm 43 days NC and until late last week, he was the first thing I thought of when I woke. (Didn't spend too much time thinking about him, but dang if he wasn't still on my subconscious mind.) This week, I thought of him upon awakening only a couple times. Whew. It takes time, but those thoughts and memories do indeed fade as you immerse yourself in your healing process and real life.

I especially like that you can look in the mirror and smile. You're a pretty terrific woman, aren't you? Much love,

~alwayst2

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2004
Wed, 11-24-2010 - 9:44am
MC:). What a fantastic feeling, to like who you see. It all starts with us doesn't it? Good for you! Have a nice day:)
Community Leader
Registered: 06-08-2010
Wed, 11-24-2010 - 11:55am
Yay for you, MC!! You are making huge strides in your journey towards healing! May you continue to take those steps and focus more and more on YOU and getting stronger...immerse yourself in what makes your heart sing and have a very very happy Thanksgiving holiday! :) Hearts<3
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-24-2010
In reply to: markscloud
Wed, 11-24-2010 - 7:08pm

Hi,

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-01-2010
Wed, 11-24-2010 - 9:12pm
Hey AAI,
My xAP is MM, so it was't me you were thinking of. I was on this board for a while in Feb, then later in April/May time frame. Like a fool, I couldn't quite get the hang of it and went back twice. This is the longest I've been NC and I do believe I got it right this time!! Ain't no going back now. :)

I hate to hear that you are struggling. As you know, you've come back to the right place. I hope you stick around and share your story with everyone. Perhaps a "refresher" course is exactly what you need to help with your struggles. I remember your moniker but not your story. Stay strong, girl.

Oct. 12, 2010 -- began my personal search and rescue mission.