Oh, you're going to get it now, Alice!!! ooooo, I'm going to give it to you goooood. Ready? ---- How on God's green planet did you EVER think it was OK to talk on your cellphone while driving!!!???------ hahahahahahaha, no really. naughty and dangerous and don't do it anymore or you're grounded.
Look, kiddo. you're fine. You didn't have the superhuman selfcontrol to stop the call on the first ring. Meh, I think you'll be able to (possibly, maybe, perhaps) get over it. You hung up instead of leaving a message, so that's good. And I have to assume you would have hung up if he'd answered (but only YOU know that for sure.) You lacked the shrewdness and forethought to consider that your number will he on his phone (and on his phonebill for that matter) - what an icky realization! ew. ew. ew. Oh, ahahahahahaha... here is my new line, "Lack of shrewdness = screwdness" Ok, so that's not sooo funny. Anyway, it's a shame that you neglected to take his # off of your phone. Again, I assume this was an oversight, and not some super-duper foolish subconscious and/or intentional sabotaging of NC and clinging to hope of future exchanges with JAM. Either way, you have some work to do. Double check that all your NC borders are secure, and also do some serious introspection to see exactly why his number was still on your phone.
You're fighting a battle with that voice in your head, but you seem to be winning the war. You didn't act on impulse and respond with an email; you came here first! You have a whole arsenal of weapons, too. You know about Jane's 48 Hour rule - you know how to navigate the fog thinking - you're holding yourself accountable - So, don't panic! You're going to get over this bump! You will!!! You're strong and focused. You can do this.
I wish I could offer sponsorship. I don't think I'd make a very good one; not only am I a spaz, but I'm married without a Dday and need to keep my involvement on the board on the QT. I hope you find a really wise and available gal to help you out. And your offer to also sponsor is amazingly generous. Lovely, you.
Please check in more than usual today. I've always found that when I'm in a struggle, somehow, without fail, somebody posts something totally unrelated to my problem but with an insight that opens up the heavens and I hear the angels do that "Awwwwwwwww!" thing.
Not that I'm worried about you, because, as I said "you're going to be FINE", but, um, will you please try to update us before I leave work today? 5:30 pst! Danke mucho!
Im in and will help as much as I can but I think you already knew that. LOL!!!!
We will all get there together. BTW, you know what hit me like a TON of bricks today??? That while I am here at work I spend quite a lot of time thinkink about XMM, the A, and how to go about moving on. It made me sick to my stomach when I realized that I dont think about my kids during the day and how THIER day is going. I dont think about if they enjoyed lunch, how they did on a quiz or who they are playing with. I cant believe that I have wasted so much thought, effort and time on something and someone so futile.
I have spent since October of 2008 thinking of XMM on a daily basis and I am so ready to purge him out of my head and heart.
alice, i love your sponsor idea---one that has been echoed by my therapist. i would be happy to be a person to give some encouragement in a moment of weakness. there are lots of different ways to help one another on this healing highway. email me if you are interested.
lillie
silence is eloquent, silence is dignified, silence is heard. ...
Oh, you're going to get it now, Alice!!! ooooo, I'm going to give it to you goooood. Ready? ---- How on God's green planet did you EVER think it was OK to talk on your cellphone while driving!!!???------ hahahahahahaha, no really. naughty and dangerous and don't do it anymore or you're grounded.
Look, kiddo. you're fine. You didn't have the superhuman selfcontrol to stop the call on the first ring. Meh, I think you'll be able to (possibly, maybe, perhaps) get over it. You hung up instead of leaving a message, so that's good. And I have to assume you would have hung up if he'd answered (but only YOU know that for sure.) You lacked the shrewdness and forethought to consider that your number will he on his phone (and on his phonebill for that matter) - what an icky realization! ew. ew. ew. Oh, ahahahahahaha... here is my new line, "Lack of shrewdness = screwdness" Ok, so that's not sooo funny. Anyway, it's a shame that you neglected to take his # off of your phone. Again, I assume this was an oversight, and not some super-duper foolish subconscious and/or intentional sabotaging of NC and clinging to hope of future exchanges with JAM. Either way, you have some work to do. Double check that all your NC borders are secure, and also do some serious introspection to see exactly why his number was still on your phone.
You're fighting a battle with that voice in your head, but you seem to be winning the war. You didn't act on impulse and respond with an email; you came here first! You have a whole arsenal of weapons, too. You know about Jane's 48 Hour rule - you know how to navigate the fog thinking - you're holding yourself accountable - So, don't panic! You're going to get over this bump! You will!!! You're strong and focused. You can do this.
I wish I could offer sponsorship. I don't think I'd make a very good one; not only am I a spaz, but I'm married without a Dday and need to keep my involvement on the board on the QT. I hope you find a really wise and available gal to help you out. And your offer to also sponsor is amazingly generous. Lovely, you.
Please check in more than usual today. I've always found that when I'm in a struggle, somehow, without fail, somebody posts something totally unrelated to my problem but with an insight that opens up the heavens and I hear the angels do that "Awwwwwwwww!" thing.
Not that I'm worried about you, because, as I said "you're going to be FINE", but, um, will you please try to update us before I leave work today? 5:30 pst! Danke mucho!
Soldier on, Alice!
Dee
Im in and will help as much as I can but I think you already knew that. LOL!!!!
We will all get there together. BTW, you know what hit me like a TON of bricks today??? That while I am here at work I spend quite a lot of time thinkink about XMM, the A, and how to go about moving on. It made me sick to my stomach when I realized that I dont think about my kids during the day and how THIER day is going. I dont think about if they enjoyed lunch, how they did on a quiz or who they are playing with. I cant believe that I have wasted so much thought, effort and time on something and someone so futile.
I have spent since October of 2008 thinking of XMM on a daily basis and I am so ready to purge him out of my head and heart.
Just had to share that Alice.
Hugs,
GMLB
Alice, why you would be scolded when it was accidental that you dialed your jam's number.
alice,
i love your sponsor idea---one that has been echoed by my therapist. i would be happy to be a person to give some encouragement in a moment of weakness. there are lots of different ways to help one another on this healing highway. email me if you are interested.
lillie