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I need your support!
| Wed, 09-22-2004 - 3:37pm |
I have never posted anything before on the internet, and its hard to believe that this is the first. I am married, and have had a relationship with a MM for almost 3 years. I have no children, he has a 5 year old and a 2 year old. Things have been bad between us for awhile now (several months). We pretty much finalized the breakup yesterday with a huge heated fight. I know the relationship had to end, but I am feeling so much pain that I don't know what to do. I would do anything to talk to him right now. I am thinking of stupid things to call him about. Things that don't matter, but I want to hear his voice. I am married to a wonderful man who would do absolutely anything for me. I have no idea why I started this, and I feel terrible for doing so. I hope I am at the bottom now, because I can't stand the thought of feeling worse than I do. No one I know knows about the affair so I have no one to talk to. I guess I knew coming into this that when it ended, it was going to hurt, but I didn't expect it to hurt this much. I need someone, anyone, to tell me that I am doing the right thing. I know I can go and see him tonight if I wanted, whether he wants to see me or not I don't know...I don't want to give in. I need to make my marriage stronger. He would never leave his wife for me and I would never leave my husband....it has to end. Sound like I am still trying to convince myself?

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XOM is in emergency services so he pops up just like your X.
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