I want to be FREE!!!
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|Wed, 08-29-2012 - 5:39am|
I've been wondering: what makes one person end an affair and be okay within a few months, while another person will still be struggling months, even years later? I think a lot of it has to do with your MIND. I've been reading in the healing library daily, plus I've read "Surviving an Affair" by Willard F Harley, and "How to Break Your Addiction to a Person" by Howard M Halpern. Here is a little from the second book I mentioned:
Their best judgment and their self-respect tell them to end it, but often, to their dismay, they hang on. They speak and act as if something were holding them back, as if their relationship was a prison and they were locked in. Friends and psychotherapist may have pointed out to them that in reality their "prison door" is wide open and that all they need to do is step outside. And yet as desperately unhappy as they are, they hold back. Some of them approach the threshold, then hesitate. Some may make brief sallies outside, but quickly retreat to the safety of prison in relief and despair. Something in them wants out. Something in them knows that they were not meant to live this way. Yet people, in droves, choose to remain in their prisons, making no effort to change them- except, perhaps, to hang pretty curtains over the bars and paint the walls in decorator colors. They may end up dying in a corner of their cell without having really been alive for years.
I feel like xAP will always have a special place in my heart. But I don't want to remain in "prison". I want out! Right now it's still a daily struggle to remain NC, but I've made up my MIND, one day I WILL BE FREE!!!