I want one last IC.......
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I want one last IC.......
| Wed, 10-13-2004 - 10:49pm |
I know I shouldn't. MM doesn't know that this time it is for sure over, I have not told him. He is used to me being a drama queen and changing my mind after telling him many other times that it has been over then changing my mind. Things have changed the last 7 weeks of no IC and barely any contact which is normal for us; I have changed and know that it is over, it HAS to be over for my sanity. He will call one night soon (a pattern we have) and I think I will meet him and tell him for sure it is over to his face and maybe have one for the road...... I know that it may mess me up for a few days but I think I can handle it. I want some closure. I want the last time to be a good one instead of the 10 seconder that happened end of August. I need this I think. PLEASE be easy on me with your posts, I know this is wrong.... He is SO wrong.....

Easy not a chance.
The problem with having one last fling is that it rarely is the last one it just leads to the next which leads to the next ETC...
And how will you make sure it last longer then 10 seconds stick a cork in his dick ?
Free
I, too, think about one last time, and about getting closure, and it goes on and on. But then I snap out of it and remember how foolish that would be. I think to myself "What is the value in one last time?" My XMM and I had one last time WAY more than one last time. Or we'd be broken up and we would have "holiday IC" -- sex on special occasions even though we were "broken up" -- can you believe that???? Then we'd be right back up to once or twice a week.
When you hear the goofy stories the rest of us have, like mine, doesn't it make you think, just a little, how silly your excuses are to get back together "just that once?"
I don't call (and I DEFINITELY can't see him in person) because I want to move on and be strong. If that leaves him wondering and scratching his head not understanding what happened, that's OK with me. He can deal with it :-)
All of us are different and you gotta do what you gotta do, but I say DON'T DO IT, GIRL!!!
Meg
I agree with the opinions of all before - don't do it. One last meeting will "solve" nothing. What's more: The only closure you'll get is the one you'll achieve YOURSELF; whether you talk to him or not.
In my opinion, the worst about seeing the affair one last time (apart from the fact that is is highly likely you will continue as before) is that you'll have to start the process of letting go completely anew. You'll be back to square 1 in all your desires, resolutions, pain. And, out of experience, I know this is SO much harder than realising and facing your feelings of loss/craving/sadness/desperation etc. once, and then, sometime later, hopefully be done with them for good.
From a lot of the posts here you can see that this process of letting go can be a VERY long one, indeed, and you will need a lot of your energies to get through it successfully. So, if you break off this progress once (or twice, or 3 times...) you have to go through it again and again..., losing your precious energy on a lost cause. This will weaken you and not help you on the new way you clearly want to go.
Do it the (only seemingly!) harder way: Go through this hell once and for all. Make it easier on you in the long run. You say in your post that you KNOW it's over: Act on that. If need be, write him 1 (one!) short mail, stating the facts. All the rambling that you need to do, do it here on the board or maybe in a private journal you could start writing for yourself (this really helps!).
Wishing you good decisions and strength,
Hugs,
M.