i was so close

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2011
i was so close
13
Tue, 08-21-2012 - 10:47pm
So close. To being a super tweener on august 27th. I don't want to get into the details of why or what i said but i emailed. He didn't wb of course. I wasn't exactly fishing but i guess it counts as contact. I hate to think about restarting a clock and reaching a certain date in order to say i am past him and over him. Because i feel that i am just as much as before i emailed. It wasn't even about him or wanting him. I wanted a certain something from him as a favor. rationally i knew he wouldn't do it but in that moment.i was in such a state due to circumstances that i wrote to him without thinking even almost like i was out of body or on autopilot. It was weird. But that is what happened. And i think i don't get a six month medal.

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-19-2011
Thu, 08-23-2012 - 1:40pm

Like a no-contact panic button, Pink!! :smileyhappy: Thanks for your kind words too.

You know, I AM a supertweener from my other A (how bad does that sound, my other A...multiple As:smileysad: ) BUT, I am a supertweener somewhere! That A began after the other one ended and I am even almost a VET ...we stopped talking oh, in late September I think? I don't even know the date but that's almost a year! So, yay me, he would certainly take the bait if I fished in a needy moment and I have never ever tried to reach him... thoughts of him do make me cringe though, like WHAT WAS I THINKING and how could I DO that...wish I felt that way over A1!

But I am definitely doing okay regardless of the little stumble. I would be far worse without support here. xx

Pages