im back again :(
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im back again :(
| Mon, 11-01-2010 - 6:33am |
Hi ladies
Well Im back after a long break from here. Being honest it with you i was too embarrassed and ashamed to post because i had fallen back into

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Gal,
Of course I'm very sad to hear this.
gaL,
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I'm glad these are your words because we'd get a big 'ol black mark on our records if we said this to you. And while on the subject. being weak around this JAM seems to be your excuse for lettin him suck you back in each and every time. So how abour trying something a little different. Now that you are 5 days NC, the only way to make it 10 days and then 30 days, etc. is to COMPLETELY IGNORE HIM, AVOID HIM AT ALL COSTS, NO FB OR EMAILS OF ANY KIND, and go about business as if he does not even exist. Can you do that?
Heck, it's just me an xjam here in my office daily, and he knows not to GO THERE because I have TAUGHT him never to disrespect me again. "We teach people how to treat us." I know you have read this on here a gazillion times. So, how about teaching your cheating a$$ JAM that you could care less if he is still breathing? TURN on your heals and walk in the other direction (and I mean even if it looks deliberate and obvious), the minute you see him coming in your direction. If he approaches your desk you say, "You are in my space." Period. Turn you chair so your back is to him. I don't care if he has a hissy fit, or says something nasty, you just do it and ignore him. You TEACH him that you are NOT GOING TO GO THERE ANYMORE.
Sometimes I feel like a parrot around here. I am constanting having to repeat myself and you know what? It's really getting old.
<<>>,
GAL,
Warning.........HARD LINE and ADVICE coming.
You are teasing him and leading him on.
You haven't made the break, no matter how many times you say you have gone NC.
He doesn't know it. We men are not stupid. We will keep coming back as long as we are welcomed. We quit making an effort when we are rebuffed. True, it may mean doing it more than once. No one wants to fight a losing battle.
You need to set the boundaries and stick to them. You need to read and FOLLOW the NC rules. That means Facebook and all other types of keeping track of him. You need to eliminate him from your life.
We only miss what could have been. I know I don't miss what it really was.
Thanks so much guys I realy needed to hear those words today.
I am beating my head here trying to figure out why i constantly crave the attention from this JAM.....its ridiculous. I feel like its this bad addiction that I cant seem to get rid of...its driving me insane.
You are so right Iddy. This is exactly what i have done wrong. I have thought him that it is ok to treat me with the disrespect that he does. Im mean he doesn't see any problem in going from telling me for days that he wants to all of a sudden completely ignoring me and treating me like a dont exist....and why? Because I stupidly let him...and for what? Crumbs of attention. I want to slap myself!
Gee wilikas, Gal...how many times are you going to step on that damn rack and get whacked by it?
hi Clarity i apreciate your tough love I really do.
((Hugs)))
hi iddy :) thank you for your vote of confidence. I really do feel a lot different this time. I think the difference this time is that for some strange reason only now
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