I'm ready for my flogging

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2010
I'm ready for my flogging
6
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 12:48am
I blew it today.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-17-2010
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 3:15am

My Dear Keep,


It sure sucks and my heart goes out to (((you))).

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2010
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 8:43am

KS-


My heart aches for you too. Surely you have to realize how self destructive you are being. Surely you must realize how much control you are allowing him to have... and I say allowing because you truly do have a choice and you need to start believing that. You need to start believing in yourself that you are strong enough to do this. You need to start self protecting honey- you really do. Stop touching the hot stove. Start acting with dignity and self respect- you know those things you wanted to get back? Nothing good will come of doing drive bys

Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 9:08am

KS,
I don't think you need a flogging, you need a hug. (((HUG)))
I, too, did the "looking for the clown" routine, and a lot later in my ending process than you are now. Chalk it up to another lesson learned (hopefully you _did_ learn your lesson). The timing of your lapse makes me think that perhaps your T sessions are stirring up a lot of emotion that might be difficult to handle, especially after the T says "times up" -- then you're kicked out into the real world, all raw and emo - left on your own to deal with all the feelings that have come to the surface. Why don't you make a date for coffee with a trusted g-friend or someone for immediately after your T sessions? Just a thought.

Love to you, KS. You're going to be ok.
Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-24-2010
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 9:29am

KS,


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2009
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 12:50pm

Hmmmm.....your M is on life support, your H may be moving out, your kid/kids are devastated and hurt by your behavior, and you are out stalking the man who had a hand in all of this? Someone needs to get their priorities straight but I'll cut you a little slack because that fog you are in must be super thick. Makes it difficult to even walk a straight line. ;-)


I like Dee's idea about having plans after a T session. That will divert your attention from

   ~Iddy~ 


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-10-2010
Wed, 05-19-2010 - 1:50pm

Once again, thank you!