I'm really sad today!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
I'm really sad today!
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 11:17am
Well, day 3 of NC. The problem is, he hasn't called me? Is this turning into a control thing? I can't take this anymore. One day I'm perfectly fine and then here we go again. I am so stupid for letting him come down here last weekend. I was fine up until then. He was just as loving as he used to be before we broke up. I keep letting him suck me in over and over again. Why can't I stop this? Why do I keep doing this to myself over and over again? This is sick! I am very depressed!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 11:34am
I'm sorry you're hurting. :( Feels like an emotional addiction, doesn't it? Everyone says it gets better with time and total NC. . .So I guess we have to trust the ones who have gone through the pain before us. Hmm???

Hang in there, Sweets.



Avatar for crystal_clr
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 11:40am
You CAN stop it. We all can. We just need to realize that spending time with these men ALWAYS results in pain. We have to look at the big picture. How much of our lives do we want to throw away to this unproductive cycle? What will be left of us in the end? I know it hurts when they don't contact us, but one thing I've learned is most MM have alot more patience than we do. Over and over I hear of women going through the pain of the affair ending and they start doing really well - things are looking better, and about the 8 week mark - guess who pops up? That's right MM!!

You can do this, you just need to take a hard look at it all and stop feeding the demons.

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2003
Mon, 05-19-2003 - 2:03pm
Hey girl... Go back and re-read your earlier post, and do that. Look at those notes you put up with fresh eyes. As many people told me about my XMM, stop idealizing OM. It IS a control thing... for both of you. Don't think about his control, worry only about the things YOU have control over. Start by just focusing on today, not everyday after. Only today. YOU control today. What will you do with it? Take a step backwards, or a leap towards healing? You CAN DO THIS, Girl!! I believe in you!! (((HUGS)))