It has been one month, and I'm good!
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| Thu, 04-21-2005 - 4:06pm |
It's been a month with no contact and I will say that it has been getting easier every day for me. I think the big reason is that I was ready to let go of this guy. It took me 6 months to get to this point, but that is o.k. I still think about him, but the feelings aren't the same. I haven't felt the urge to email him, or call him - actually, I deleted his phone number, so I can't call him - didn't memorize the number either - good girl Sherry!!, or have fantasies about him anymore... What a feeling of freedom!! Not every day is as good as this day is for me, but I just keep going..
I'm working on my marriage. My husband is someone I can't see myself living without.
We are working on our communication skills.. I gave my husband the article that Freemenow has out on the board called "The Awakening". We have a looonnnggg way to go, but I plan on retiring with him in warm climate - enough of snow!!
This board has been a tremendous help for me. I haven't posted alot but have gotten alot of my strength from reading all of the posts and the logical and straight forward advice from Freemenow..
I know Free that you said he will probably try to call me, but I have caller ID and just won't answer the phone. I'm hoping he will respect my wishes and not call me and so far he hasn't.
I will say that a therapist recommended a book called the Four Agreements to me. What an eye opener for me. I can relate alot of what is said in that book to how I ended up in an affair in the first place. I don't usually recommend books to people I don't know, but if anyone is curious, it is well worth the price. I know it has been around on the bookshelves for a while, but it probably was the right time in my life to find it.
Max, you will be o.k.
Sherry

Sherry
Good to here that your do well, hope to here one day that you and hubby have made a complete recovery and are buying retirement property in Brasil down the beach from me.
Were did you find this book can you provide the name of the bookstore if it is a big chain store.
Be well and best future to you and yours.
Free
Hi Free,
Brazil sounds oh so good... I'm hoping I can get him as far as Arizona! Although he does love Jamacia..
The book is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. I bought it at Borders and I believe you can buy it via the internet thru Borders. He also has a website www.miguelruiz.com. You can go as far as you want with what he has to offer.
Here are the four agreements and a little bit about them. I read this book a few times, and I will say that it definitely helped me to break off this affair...
1. Be Impeccable With Your Word
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
2. Don’t Take Anything Personally
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.
3. Don’t Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
4. Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret.
Hope the rest of your day is good..
Sherry