It's Over. Hurt.Happy..and Sad
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| Tue, 09-15-2009 - 9:16am |
Where do I begin.. I think I have posted on this board a couple of times.. my life has been crazy with everything happening from the A.
So finally after all this time it has ended. The last incident was pretty much him treating me like his side sl*t that he could use and abuse in a way. He would say how much he loved me like no one else but in the same turn would be ok with my having s*x with another person. I think a lot of his meaness came from his frustration that I did not give him the upper hand and he was jealous of my husband.
The last month we have gone five,seven days with out talking . I hoped we could stay friends. I know a lot of people are against it but we work together. I thought after all pain he caused he could suck it up and be friends and we can move on to a better place. I finally realize anything more then friends was not going to work and to be honest I have not been attractive to him in a long time..
well he has pretty much told me he can't be my friend because it hurts to much. I part of me want to scream and say thats because your selfish. You couldn't get your way and you can't put yourself out for anyone. I feel like he hurts me twice being so mean as he was and then not even taking an effort to be friends and civil. Nothing seems good enough for him and I just get screwed twice... I am hurt and sad but what can I do.
I get friends is not the best way to help end an affair. I also am someone who hates tension with people. I am friends with all my ex's.

Welcome to EAS JK.
You are friends with all your x's?
Hi Jen!
You may not remember but i spoke to you a little back in the spring, and both out situations were quite similar in that AP was a coworker and in their 40s and we both 20's. So your story stuck with me and i often wondered how you're doing.
I am in the midst of ending as well. But certainly i kept the upper hand in this. Did not give xAP the satisfaction of hurting me. Of course he would swear he'd never hurt me, and he never has really. But the mere fact that he was ok with me being M to another guy and him going home to his precious family (he claims his kids only, not W), that alone spoke so much. I couldn't take it anymore. And altho i haven't told him straight up what my reason is for ending, but rather we're having smaller work related or personal arguments or fights which lead to us not taking for days at a time, and the A is dying a slow death. That hurts so much but i am glad that i did not surrender my control or power to him.
Please feel free to email me offline if you wish.
Hugs,
Sunshine
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Sunshine
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OMG how are u? I really was so happy for your support. well my A too has died out due to fights, plain disrespect. I started to feel used and could not take it anymore. Since August we have gone a few days here and there of not talking. The last time was around this past Labor day when we were NC for six days because I was angry at him. I did break NC and texted that I was not mad anymore (I know stupid) and wanted to be friends. That was what he texted me last that after I was done being mad at him he would like to try for friends. I did that and he now still can't be friends...
The fog has lifted.. I was sad and hurt yesterday that he now can totally ignore me because he can;t bare to be friends with me because he loves me..BULLSH*T... I feel better after posting because they were right why would I even want a friend like that. I guess I HATE tension and I hate conflict. I wish we never started this damn thing...
anytime!
waiting4thesunshine@gmail.com
Sunshine
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Sunshine
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