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anonymous user
Registered: 12-31-1969
Sat, 09-08-2012 - 4:44pm

Someone, I think Clarity, had suggested on another thread we should start a jokes thread. I think it's a good idea since I think most of us feel like I feel, that I used to be a happy, carefree person, and lately all my joy seems to have been drained from me, and I WANT IT BACK!!

A man is walking through the fairgrounds when a fortune teller tells him, come over here and I will tell you your future. The man replies, what can you tell me about myself? You are married and a father of two she tells him. That's what you think he says, I'm a father of three. That's what you think, she replies. :smileyhappy:

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-24-2005
In reply to:
Sat, 09-08-2012 - 5:09pm

Love that!

I know we started a humor thread in the H.L., but there's no reason we can't get one going upstairs.  But if you have a chance check it out in the H.L...there are lots...and you just have to read the one about the tandem story.

Okay...let me think.  I have thousands.

Okay...this elderly man goes to the doctor and while he's there, he mentions how he believes his wife is losing her hearing, but he doesn't really want to bring it up with her...because he's not really sure.

The doctor tells him that he can do a simple test at home to see about it.  Just stand about 40 feet away and ask her a your normal speaking voice.  If she doesn't answer, move in about 10 feet and repeat the question.  If she still doesn't answer, keep moving closer 'til she does...and then let me know.

So, the man goes home.  His wife is at the stove, back to him and decides this would be a good time to check her hearing out.  He stands about 40 feet away and his normal speaking voice..."Honey, what's for dinner?"  No response.

He moves in about 10 feet..."Honey, what's for dinner?"  No response.

He moves in another 10 feet..."Honey, what's for dinner?  Wow...still no response.

He moves in...he's 10 feet away..."Honey, what's for dinner?  No response!

Now he comes right up behind her..."Honey, what's for dinner?

"For the 5th time, John, chicken!"