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| Wed, 01-21-2004 - 10:00pm |
I sat at work today and thought about the 1st day XMM called me. He called me at work, started with those simple flattering "come on" lines. I just laughed and thought "yeah, what ever". Boy I wish at that time some body would have just thumped me in the head and said "Don't go there". Now here I am 2 years later, wishing I would have thumped myself in the head, and said NO! I never dreamed in a million years that I would have allowed myself to be involved in an A. I think about the sick feelings,(anxiety, stress), The sneaking around, trying to get out of the house, the lying, etc. The feelings that I now have for THAT MAN, and recently the feelings of relief that the A is finally over.
After coming to this board and reading all of these helpful postings. I run thru conversations in my head that he & I had. Things that he said to me, about how he felt, how he wasn't gonna leave his home, how that I could be in his future if I choose to be. It's "cakeman" talk.
And to think, at one time I was soooooooooo stuck to him, hanging on every word, sitting by the phone waiting for "the call", So into him. I sure am glad that I snapped out of it.
Needed to vent, Thanks
