Just an illusion..........?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2008
Just an illusion..........?
5
Fri, 08-06-2010 - 2:18pm

Hey everyone


I have been good and stayed NC.. But things go around your head and im quite embarrassed to write this here but here it is.....


When I was there once he said to me "had you noticed I dont text you when im sober.. its when im drunk and start feeling hor*y I think to text... had you noticed that?"


I sat there and

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2010
Fri, 08-06-2010 - 4:00pm
I can think of a word to describe him.....three letters and I am sure you can do a whole lot better.....keep up the NC :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-20-2009
Fri, 08-06-2010 - 4:10pm

Whoa. dang. ouch.

Sunbeam, brace up. Those types of memories are going to be replayed in your head without the benefit of fogged up glasses now that you're and Ender. It's not pretty.

Your past is not your future. Thank God.

Hang in there, kiddo.
Dee

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2008
Fri, 08-06-2010 - 7:06pm

Thanks ladies


I have been mulling it over and over all day and couldnt stop... it made me feel so stupid, cheap, stupid and did i mention stupid...!


Yes looking at things isnt pretty is it and i have lots of lovely examples to take my pick of. it would make your hair curl and ..... so why oh why did I go back.........???


Have a lovely weeekend ladies, keep strong


sunbeam

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2010
Fri, 08-06-2010 - 10:15pm
Oh sweetie, you are so not stupid. Do not let yourself ever believe that EVER. EVER.
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2010
Sat, 08-07-2010 - 2:01pm

Hi Sunbeam- Now that the veil of the fog is not in your way, looking back on those A memories with your new reality glasses on is not fun. I am sure we all have more memories like these than we'd like, but use it to keep yourself in check. You are now seeing things as they really were, and not as you thought they were when you were fogged in. We were so good and rationalizing those types of statements, twisting them around in our heads to convince ourselves that we were more than we really were. We weren't and now we can see that... Keep that memory close at heart. Remember what the A REALLY was. When we stop romanticizing it, we begin to heal.

Hugs,

Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/
Jane
NC/LC since January 28, 2010
http://secretlifeofjane.wordpress.com/